Paisley certainly aroused some mixed feelings! I wonder how much of that is down to the colourways often chosen, or to the relatively complex and asymmetrical nature of the pattern, or both? I like natural shapes which are complex and asymmetrical, but they are almost always in subdued colours, or a limited palette - maybe full-on psychedelic paisley is just a bit of an assault on overstimulated brains?
A lurid paisley
A subtle but luxuriant Jaccard paisley
Paisley feathers
And finally, the image I found which most appeals to me, a Paisley maple leaf design which combines the flamboyance of the shape with the flame and leaf and nature references and uses a limited colour palette to great effect (embroidery pattern here)
LAST WEEK'S GOALS:
Daisy
- FINISH revisions for accepted paper
- Keep going on revisions for old paper
- Write some sections anything at all for out-of-my-field discussion paper
- Grading!!!
- Website and award stuff for association
Dame Eleanor Hull
- - finish the damned essay
- - Notes on MET book and C&C read weeks ago
- - Grade more grad drafts and one set of undergrad papers
- - work on at least one spring class
- - Walk with friend, eye exam
- - do yoga at least 4 times, weights x2, walk x5
heu mihi
- 1. Figure out plans for next (and last) archive visit, sigh
- 2. Work on research 2 hours x 4
- 3. Work on getting reviewers for journal article
- 4. Email catch-up (two things! Do it!)
- 5. Rest
JaneB
- - don't do more than 9 hours a day max. Aim for one WEEK day with NO WORK.
- - prepare teaching for next week.
- - work on the neglected paper (sending emails will be enough)
- - list out some easy steps on the Toy Project
- - do minimum house chores that keep getting lost.
- - do something creative - D&D, words on a page, SOMETHING.
Julie
- 1. Spend as much of non-teaching day (Thursday) on research as possible.
- 2. Go to writing group on Friday and try again for four hours!
- 3. Continue with teaching prep for next term.
- 4. Read a PhD student's work in advance of a meeting.
- 5. Do only essential admin.
- 6. House/life stuff - book eye test, start planning Christmas (needs a whole TLQ post in itself).
- 7. Exercise - no chance of getting to Dame Eleanor's level, but run twice, walk other days.
- 8. Get to bed early! –
I like the more muted paisley patterns, more or less monochrome, or with just a little bit of an accent color. As to preferences, you know the old joke about the Scotsman: "What a guid thing we don't all like the same things," he said, "or think what a shortage of oatmeal there wuid be."
ReplyDeleteAs JaneB observed in the comments a couple of weeks ago, I am a cat and do what I like, most of the time. Once I assemble lists of things to do, I generally give the most time to the things I want to do, and try to minimize the time spent on those I don't like or think are stupid. Trust me to find the fastest way to get through required online trainings, for example (download a transcript of the video, if there is one, and speed-read; if the video is required, run it in one window or on one device while doing other things elsewhere). I like to listen to wordless music while grading; that keeps it from seeming like such a chore. It's a rare day when I don't do some sort of fun reading. When I feel fed up or overwhelmed, I give up on work and bake cookies and/or read or do something else escapist till I feel more like coping. It sounds self-indulgent but somehow things do get done. Mostly.
How I did:
- finish the damned essay. NO. But I finally found the reference I need!!! That makes me feel a lot better about the tedious re-organizing I need to do.
- Notes on MET book and C&C read weeks ago. NO. But other useful material located, as above (oh, I guess that means even more note-taking is backed up, rats).
- Grade more grad drafts and one set of undergrad papers. YES. I am all caught up on grading going into the Thanksgiving break.
- work on at least one spring class. NO.
- Walk with friend, eye exam. YES to both (am getting two new pairs of glasses). ALSO finally had dinner with the set of friends who had to cancel last month due to injury, AND braved the mall to buy a couple of tops.
- do yoga at least 4 times, weights x2, walk x5: YES, ONCE (shoulder strain), YES.
New goals:
- finish the damned essay (now urgent)
- Notes on MET book and C&C read weeks ago
- work on at least one spring class
- do an interesting long walk
- do some tidying, unpacking, or other house task
- do yoga at least 4 times, weights x2, walk x5
I like the feathers and the maple leaf, I think because they let me focus on the design and shape of the paisley pattern rather than being distracted/put off by the colour and noise.
DeleteThinking about preferences and TLQ is a good prompt, but a difficult one. I tend to add stuff to my weekly lists that I know I have to do, whether I really want to or not. Partly it's a defence mechanism: a way of reminding myself that if research/writing didn't happen, it's because other stuff got in the way. BUT the flipside is that sometimes the other stuff becomes a handy excuse for why I didn't write. I think the solution is to figure out how to allocate minimal time to these must-do activities, as Dame Eleanor suggests.
More generally, part of joining TLQ for me was realising that I need to readjust priorities now. Preferences are difficult as a prompt, since I do know what I want to be doing (research, writing, travel, fun reading), but there is a lot more stuff to do now on the home front. A lot of it is tedious and repetitive, but the feminist in me thinks it does have to be recognised as important. And yet it doesn't bring a sense of achievement. And there's grief work, and trying to fit in exercise because it matters for self-care. Work-wise the problem is that the kinds of teaching I prefer involve more time and effort. I actually enjoy lecturing: both the process of figuring out how to present stuff in an hour's slot and actually delivering it, since I'm in control. But increasingly we're told in the humanities that lecturing is outdated. I almost certainly over-prepare for teaching, but I don't have the confidence just to walk into a classroom and wing it.
Last week
1. Spend as much of non-teaching day (Thursday) on research as possible. - YES (ish)
2. Go to writing group on Friday and try again for four hours! - YES (it was bliss, apart from one guy who cracked his knuckles. Fortunately he left at lunchtime.)
3. Continue with teaching prep for next term. - Some, still anxiety-inducing.
4. Read a PhD student's work in advance of a meeting. - YES
5. Do only essential admin. - NO, need to rethink 'essential'
6. House/life stuff - book eye test, start planning Christmas (needs a whole TLQ post in itself). - YES to eye test, sort of to Christmas (well, I ordered a turkey)
7. Exercise - no chance of getting to Dame Eleanor's level, but run twice, walk other days. - YES on the running, didn't walk every day, but some.
8. Get to bed early! – Only twice, but it's a start.
This week is strange because I only have three working days as here in the UK many academics are out on strike Thursday and Friday. (Presumably it's the same in the US with Thanksgiving this week?) Annoyingly, Thursday is my non-teaching day and Friday only has two hours teaching. The official line is not to do research on strike days, as research is one of our contractual activities and so if we're not getting paid, we shouldn't do the work. However, it always seems to me like self-sabotage. I will probably see how I feel on Thursday, maybe prioritise exercise and some house stuff but do some research on the quiet if I feel like. Friday my kids are off school, so that will actually be a day off.
1. Teaching prep.
2. Emails (try to be efficient)
3. Write urgent student reference.
4. Maybe do research
5. Exercise - run twice, pilates once, walk other days.
6. House stuff
7. Day off on Friday, probably Christmas shopping with kids.
That was a busy week! Lots of stuff done! Good luck with the shopping, that would be the scariest part of the week for me!
DeleteSo true about domestic stuff being unrewarding and repetitive... It should all be valued for sure, but I have a hard time with even valuing what I do in that realm because it is so damned boring!
The "lectures are all bad" bandwagon makes me crazy... There are many ways to do brilliantly engaging lectures in any field, a good lecture is an active learning experience for students, it is a conversation, it gives context and form to so many things. Not every concept can be reduced to problem-solving activities... Variety and engagement in material is more important than delivery method I think....
That was me... Forgot name thingy...
DeleteAnd way to go DEH on all the done things and the almost finished essay! Love love love your coping methods - giving up and baking cookies provides a whole new perspective and everything is better with cookies!
Lecturing is a thing because it is efficient and it works! And if you stop to check in with students periodically, it is interactive. Just write your annual reports to play up your innovative use of a variety of teaching techniques including efficient information transfer through oral/aural interfaces!
DeleteIt is much harder to work to preferences when you're the only adult in the household. Two people can divide chores by preference and/or ability, but one alone just has to tackle everything.
As to exercise, for health reasons I have to prioritize it; if I don't move around, I feel it within a couple of days and then everything goes downhill and I don't get anything at all done, so exercise is the cost of doing business, for me. Fortunately I'm also a twitchy person who likes to move.
Like all teaching modes, lecturing can be problematic (transferring the words from the notes of the teacher to the notes of the student made a LOT of sense in a medieval world where books were very expensive/rare, but it isn't very efficient now - although I would note that copying out spelling words, vocabulary words, scripts or poems or lyrics, remains an excellent way to properly internalise and remember them).
DeleteBut lecturing is also a direct descendent of the oldest kind of actual learning - sitting around a fire in the evening or under a tree in the heat of the day and listening to someone tell a story (there's a substantive difference between watching someone else do stuff then copying them, and being TAUGHT how to do something - the latter greatly speeds up information transfer and was transformative in the evolution of humans). The shared experience of listening to then talking about a story and learning useful or true things from it is baked into our culture for thousands of years.
Bad seminars are much worse than bad lectures - you don't even end them with decent notes, and for the more sensitive student they often leave feeling worse about themselves and their abilities or social connections with the subject than they did coming in... (and bad practicals/fieldwork can be expensive AND dangerous AND boring all in one!)
Ooooh I love the black and white feathers! And the Jaccard is pretty cool especially from a distance…
ReplyDeleteWork preferences and TLQ… Hmmm… I’m still in the honeymoon phase of my new job and I love most of what I do. I’m so happy to be here that even the annoying parts seem better than usual. I did not fully understand how much my previous position took out of me until I left and started here… I’m still doing too many things and not managing to keep enough time for the really TLQ things like thinking and reading and really focusing on generating new research work, but it is getting better as I get settled. Things I don’t like are housework, anything that involves large groups of people, lawn mowing, house painting, most cleaning tasks, and doing dishes. I wish I could get rid of some of the life things that I do not enjoy and resent because they drag me away from interesting things…
Last week’s goals:
FINISH revisions for accepted paper DONE YAY!!!!
Keep going on revisions for old paper NOPE
Write some sections anything at all for out-of-my-field discussion paper NOPE
Grading!!! DONE
Website and award stuff for association IN PROGRESS
This was a rough week for teaching, I counted days to the end of term and realized I needed to reorganize the rest of the labs and lectures to fit them in and had to do a lot of unexpected work to figure out what to do. Hazards of teaching a new course! But it all worked out ok and I should be able to keep things on track for the rest of the term. I did get my marking done too. And I had a wonderful time with an unexpected musical adventure, the university orchestra was unexpectedly short an instrument I play so I got to be the fancy guest player for an awesome concert. I am hoping that leads to a few more of those, nice to use a different part of my brain and meet the music department!
This week’s goals:
URGENT revisions for old paper
URGENT write something for out-of-my-field discussion paper
Finish website and award stuff for association
New conference stuff
Clean house after construction chaos IF that is finished this week
Paint bedrooms if construction is done
Another element of privilege in my life is that we hire housecleaners, and Sir John (mostly) does the dishes, which I dislike. I do other houseworky things that I don't mind. Your musical adventure sounds wonderful! I'm glad that transpired and hope it leads to more musical enjoyment. Also I'm glad to hear that your new job is all you hoped it would be. I hope you'll be happier with the house when the repairs and painting are over with. I rather like painting, but it is tiring.
DeleteThe music sounds great. And I hope once the house is finished it will feel worth it.
DeleteI'm late to the party (as usual), so I'm just going to check in and then read everyone else's comments! We have a friend visiting for Thanksgiving week--the same friend with whom we stayed in Greece, actually--so work is being all mixed up with fun. I'm also being hit hard with journal stuff at the moment; the first proofs of the next issue are in, and we have a surprising spate of new submissions! So that's taking up a lot of my time.
ReplyDeleteOn the theme, then--since I'm chatting away when I hadn't planned to--I find that I really like gritty, satisfying, editorial-type work, like reading proofs or fixing footnotes or (one of my tasks for the week) transcribing a Latin text so that I'll have it on my computer when I go to the archives next week, said text only being available in the library's reading room. I always get a nice feeling of accomplishment from these tasks, but I'm haunted by the awareness that I'm not actually doing the difficult think-work that truly makes projects move forward. Oh well.
Last week:
1. Figure out plans for next (and last) archive visit, sigh - Yes
2. Work on research 2 hours x 4 - Yes
3. Work on getting reviewers for journal article - Worked on it; I only have 1 lined up so far
4. Email catch-up (two things! Do it!)--um, maybe? More emails came in. I certainly responded to more than 2.
5. Rest - Probably. I did sleep rather better than usual once I got home from my travels.
This week:
-Maybe look at the microfilm I inadvertently ordered from the library? I feel bad just letting it sit at the check-out desk. Not that anyone cares, at all.
-Look at vita in reading room
-Reserve reading room spots and MSS
-Journal: Process new MS for review; identify and request reviewers; work through proofs that are due on Monday (but we're still waiting for the authors to look at them); sort out the two even-newer submissions
-Run x 3
-Yoga x 1
That sounds like a good week last week and another fun one coming up! I hope you have a good time with your friend. I have just learned that I will be in Strasbourg for a week or so in spring 2024, so I hope you can tell me about some don't-miss things to do there. I agree about things like transcription and editing: it's nice to have very concrete things to do that stay done, rather than the seemingly endless process of revising that writing involves.
DeleteThe data-led parts of my work mostly start with a LOT of time at the microscope, identifying and counting tiny things - that phase is often one many researchers 'get stuck in' rather than writing, because there is huge satisfaction in building that concrete tally of tiny things counted, whole samples counted etc. - it's a one way staircase to done, measured out in tick-off-able steps, where writing (especially for less experienced or just for STEM people who don't find it enjoyable) is more a chaotic attempt to scramble up a slick slope, sliding back, clinging to handholds, replanning your route - it's hard and unpredictable and sometimes you work for a week and end up further from done than you started, or realising you're aiming for the wrong done, and the staircase is known and satisfying...
DeleteI love editing work as well! My work is in some ways more like sciences than humanities, in that I use quite a lot of quantitative methods. That means there's always a long stage between finding stuff in the archives, and having stuff to write about. Usually two stages in fact: creating databases/spreadsheets and then analysing them. Both those middle stages can feel very tedious! But in some ways, the writing is then easier and more fun, because I have specific things to build an argument with.
DeleteI realised thinking more about preferences that I love reading around stuff, and I haven't done enough of that lately.
I feel I should note that I recognize that my felinity is a very privileged position. I don't have children, I do have a partner, due to demographic shifts I have half the students I had a decade ago, so grading feels far less pressured than it once did. I do not have a British research board to answer to w/r/t research, so I can work on what I want and let it take the time it takes. In the humanities, getting grants/applying for funding isn't really a thing, so I don't have that pressure either. I'm now a full professor, meaning there are no more promotions available (Cat knows I don't want to be an administrator), so trying to get good annual reviews is a matter of self-respect. Salary compression is such that raises aren't going to amount to much, and though money is always nice, I'd really rather have the low-pressure life I'm now leading, than feel like I always have to be scrambling to do more in order to earn merit pay.
ReplyDeleteThat sounds like an envious position to be in for sure! Between team teaching, overloads, and no tenure, an unattainable dream from the UK - but the attitude of mind can definitely be adopted!
DeleteIt's been a pretty... interesting couple of weeks, but here's the update:
ReplyDelete** last week I had the first of what is likely to be a chain of appointments, and was diagnosed with combined-type ADHD (and told I am almost certainly also autistic - the combined diagnosis would make sense as it would bring together a lot of my mental and physical health issues under a coherent explanation, and offers some different approaches to both accommodations at work and treatment/support for issues which... well, EXISTING approaches have not worked despite trying for several decades, so it can only be good to have something else to try, right?). So onto more waiting lists for further diagnostics, screenings and access to services, and I don't know how I feel about it, but I'm doing some reading and exploring and cautious poking at the edges of the idea!
** I mentioned last week that there was a small drip in my ceiling? Well, that kind of escalated, and right now workmen are on the roof in the process of replacing all the wood and roofing felt under the tiles. This is going to take all of the rainy day account money and then some, but fixing a leaky roof is the epitome of the purpose of rainy day savings, right?? And the situation was found before any structural damage occurred in the rest of the house, I don't have to move out or even move lots of stuff to get the work done, and one of the plusses of living in an unfashionable part of the North of England is that it is possible to find professional, skilled tradesmen with availability to actually do urgent jobs urgently. So it could be a LOT worse.
** As Julie mentioned, industrial action is underway. Which is also stressful - talking to students, trying to work out what is and isn't to be done according to my ethics, union advice, the importance of tasks for my career as opposed to my employer (as Julie mentions above, research is such a difficult thing to navigate in this context), engaging digitally (I am not good at in person pickets, temperamentally (I dislike large groups, especially shouty ones) and constitutionally (my lower body joint problems greatly dislike standing around) PLUS today there is the ROOF). We strike two days this week and one day next week, and are working to contract from yesterday for... an indefinite period. So that means pay deductions for the strike days AND the working to contract (my uni are being quite "reasonable" and only deducting a percentage - others are deducting 100% of pay for working to contract! Which just proves how hugely reliant universities are on people working beyond what they are paid to do). So the roof thing is terrible timing - especially as last month I put down a deposit to get the doors and windows replaced (my house is 35 years old this year and so it's hardly surprising that these things are coming together), and had just started to get back to paying for help with things like decluttering (hoarding type behaviour and organisation of STUFF challenges are classic ADHD symptoms... plus I'm creaky and lack a partner to tackle things with, so hiring someone - especially the lovely person I was lucky enough to find - is worth it). Ugh!
** we are also moving into the assessment period of the academic year, when student melt downs start, on top of the whole cost of living/ongoing pandemic whether acknowledged or ignored thing - I'm currently supporting one student with formally diagnosed Long COVID and several dealing with brain fog and fatigue problems after a months-long sequence of 'minor illnesses' following a COVID infection, on top of the usual (neurodivergent and anxiety/depression prone students have always gravitated towards me, and this week alone I've walked three students through how to access support services and a couple more through their options and helped them get a plan in place, which involves long email exchanges or video calls and a lot of emotional labour that I CAN do, but it COSTS).
Delete** and I'm really stressed about the expectations that I will eat out in a restaurant with external examiners who have travelled across the country "just to meet us" or go to an in person away day in a random hotel conference suite; I will go masked, but
** oh, and my 'dodgy hip' (mild congenital deformation of the joint) has picked this month to start a whole new kind of "ouchy not quite working" which I suspect is the start of the arthritic degradation I've been promised since I was 5 - so far it always resolves on stretching, but it HATES getting in the car and sometimes randomly decides to go wobbly when I'm walking. Plus my anxiety (and COVID-avoidance and random wobbly thing) mean that taking the bus to campus is not a good alternative (one an hour, 15 minute walks each end, winter weather, no mask requirement on public transport here). And the Teaching Tsar is getting REALLY fed up with my trimester of disasters (I've missed in person teaching/meetings this trimester because of: migraine, food poisoning, car breakdown, cold/really bad allergies and a roof leak). Their solution to migraines is "have your spouse drive you in just for teaching, then go home again" which... no spouse here. Am I meant to hire one??
All of which is to say, I'm not revisiting my list or posting a new one this week, I'm focused on "acting normal" around the workmen (when I want midday naps and pyjama/dressing gown only/retreat to bed days) and sorting out Christmas things and taking slow peeks at scary financial matters that I tend to mostly ignore (also ADHD problem). And keeping an eye on Fluffball, who does Not Like people being on the roof where he can't see them but he can hear them).
On Fluffball: Glendower was normally the most mellow of cats, delighted to meet new people, would follow workers around the house to supervise. But once we had a guy go up into the attic via pull-down stairs from the upstairs hall ceiling, and when Glendower heard him start to come back down he FREAKED OUT. Cat-eating monster ghost vampire in the attic!
DeleteIIRC you've suspected both ADD and autism (at least neurodivergence) for quite awhile, so it seems like it would be very satisfying to get those points confirmed. I hope it leads to better accommodations at work! As for the everyone-has-a-spouse Teaching Tsar, I don't know where to start. What is wrong with people? Even for people with partners, the partners often have jobs of their own! This is the twenty-first century, after all. Let me guess, TT is a cis het male with a traditional stay-at-home faculty wife.
Even worse - TT is a cis het female full professor with a semi-retired professor husband (also in our department, sigh), who is very extrovert, incredibly tough, and overcame the odds to get to where she is. When her husband joined our department twenty years or so ago the only job she could get was as a research assistant to another prof, and she's worked her backside off to reach full prof, build the network needed to draw in large research grants etc. whilst raising three children (now grown) - she has minimal patience with any form of weakness in staff or students, although she's not mean about it, just.. uncomprehending. She's both impressive and daunting! (and skinny and has an impressive collection of suits and shoes that even if I got anywhere near skinny I could never wear without looking like I was in fancy dress but she just looks put together; she's greatly humanised by hair that does whatever it likes!).
DeleteAnd it means we do clash about students and teaching - she just does not get why a student would not WANT to be on campus for everything, or be unable to, and clearly has a touch of the "if they are ill they should just take a term off and not bother us with it" and "some of them just shouldn't be here" mindset... and she has rigid boundaries and prioritises her own focuses much more than I do or can.
I always feel a bit of an imposter in academe because I'm just NOT tough or focused in the same way, and working with Teaching Tsar has helped me get a slightly more healthy mentality - I grok what students go through in a way she never can, and whilst I'm nowhere near as productive or successful as she is, I'm also spared some of the less interesting parts that come with running major research programmes and being in demand for high level committees. And I could never diary my time as tightly as she does - too stressful!
Yes, I've suspected I'm neuroatypical for a couple of decades now - at first I thought I was just looking for a label/an explanation for the sense of having missed some vital manual or meeting when nearly everyone else got to learn this set of rules or methods for being good at humaning, then as more and more information came out and more students with known diagnoses came through the university being THEMSELVES I began to think that if I was their age I'd probably also have that diagnosis. I asked my GP about it a decade or so ago but was told that most people grow out of it (so I was too old to really bother with) and I had a professional job, so clearly couldn't have it or if I did it didn't matter since I was doing fine (with an undercurrent of the usual just lose weight/stop looking for excuses/maybe it's early menopause that, well, is common). Anyway, Suspecting it and having it confirmed by a professional seems to be two very different things in my head. That sense of heavy things shifting around and settling into a new, more stable configuration - it's not BAD but it's not comfortable!
I'm still me, just with a better explanation of some of what that means and where I don't quite line up with the way the world is constructed, especially socially. But now I have to actually work out what that MEANS, and what to do with it... the whole roof thing on top of that was just, grrrr, I don't have TIME FOR THIS.
This trimester is just a bit much, but it's not big things - family healthy etc. - it's all me stuff, and it's not even huge stuff (lost job, life-threatening illness etc.). Sometimes life is just messy, you know?
Oh, so TT is one of those people with robust health and no brain weasels who just don't get it even if they mean well. TBH, when I was younger I was sort of that way myself, and then the universe saw fit to gift me with chronic pain, a sleep disorder, and students who had a lot of mental health issues, so I learned not just to be compassionate but to get a lot of it from personal experience. Brain fog is A Thing, as is List Overwhelm.
DeleteAnyway, congratulations on the diagnosis---I hope it leads to helpful new understandings and accommodations. And I hope by now the roof repairs are over and you and Fluffball can go back to feeling safe and unbothered by cat-eating ghost-things on the roof.
JaneB, so sorry. It sounds as if life is throwing everything it possibly can at you! Like Dame Eleanor, I hope the diagnosis gives you a way forward. I don't know if you've read Katherine May's books at all, but I found her account of an autism diagnosis in adulthood very moving, and much of what she says about the need to rest and slow down applies to everyone.
DeleteI hope the roof is fixed and Fluffball happier.
And sympathies on the work front. I don't think you should feel any obligation to engage at all with strike action, either in person or digitally. You've withdrawn your labour and stood up to be counted. I wasn't on the picket yesterday, as my son wasn't well, but I might not have gone in anyway as I was just exhausted. Today the kids were off school, so I didn't picket again. I probably will Wednesday, but in my university, the assumption is that only those who live locally (a minority) will picket in person.
DeleteYour work situation sounds a lot tougher than mine. While we have a lot of grievances here, and casualisation keeps creeping in however much we push back, our employers haven't been punitive (no deductions for ASOS so far) and it is a good place to work in many ways. I think I'm striking more because I don't want us to go the way of much of HE in the UK than because we're already at rock bottom. And I can afford to financially and in tenure terms, so it's a privileged position.