the grid

the grid

Saturday 30 September 2017

Week 4: Fantastical Goals and Where to Find Them


It's the end of the first week of term here and I'm exhausted. Both in the 'woo lots of people on campus lots of stuff to do but better food for lunch available lots of people to talk to' way and the 'grump no parking spaces no time to think too much teaching prep way kiss bye bye to real life for a few weeks while I get stuff done way'.  We're also in the middle of recruiting a fairly specialist hire in a process I have dubbed 'the unicorn hunt'. I've found out that this term has spread a bit throughout a few departments - I really must be more careful when I create terms!

All of this got me thinking about my TLQ goals - what's my mythical TLQ goal, the one that's so ephemeral in my mind that it's like reports of a mythical creature? The TLQ equivalent of the unicorn hunt, or rumours of a  phoenix reborn and taking flight. A goal that's perhaps too large, or too remote to voice in our session goals but that we know we're working towards on some level.

For this weeks topic, Do we dare name our Fantastical Goal? (without it becoming a weekly or a session goal, no pressure at all) Or is it safer just to discuss whether we do have such a goal, and why we don't feel comfortable naming it or overtly working towards it?


Amstr
-plan eating/menus and eat well
-1 hour coffee shop writing 5 days
-finalize YB
-redraft PO
-finish KLB handouts
-revise RB
-draft 10 pages of MF
-finish goals by Friday pm

Contingent Cassandra
--Lift weights 2x, garden 1x
--Keep working on more regular bedtime (after I get past the combination of two evening meetings tonight plus teaching tomorrow)
--Plan follow up on pedagogy project and send group email
--Rearrange books in apartment to make those relevant to Spring '18 classes more visible/accessible.
--Pick up at least one book relevant to Spring '18 classes at library


Dame Eleanor Hull 
1) Self: daily exercise, yoga (2x, preferably), enough sleep, work on at least 2 languages, do the necessary cooking so I can eat safely.
2) Research: 5 hours, focusing on product. I hope to put all the revised bits together and work on transitions.
3) Teaching: finish setting up assignments for undergrads.
4) House/Life: finish packing the guest room, do some other useful house thing.

Elizabeth Anne Mitchell 
Create the tables for the survey article.
Edit the survey article without ticking off my co-authors.
Update my CV for the sabbatical application.
Spend at least six hours on the grant.
Organize, toss or scan one file drawer.
Continue to expand project file with one folder per project.
Walk more than 45 minutes a day.
Edit at least five pages of the book.
Write at least four pages of the novella.
Transfer the outdoor plants to the winter pots, even if it was 90F today.

Good Enough Woman
1) Pay bills.
2) Try to embrace my job (I've been resenting its demands this semester, but it's time to remember that I'm getting paid, and I need to get on board and think postively.)
3) Finish course proposal for science fiction class.
4) Write: 15 minutes x 5 (actual writing).
5) two walks, one swim, daily stretching (even if stretching is just two minutes) morning and evening
6) do some planning for middle school writing group (the first meeting was today--VERY SCARY, but fun!)

heu mihi
1. Read and revise ch. 5
2. Draft conclusion
3. Meditate twice (being realistic, given visitors)
4. Go for a walk/look out the window most days
5. Do prep work for prof. org. project

humming42 (carried over)
1 Write grant proposal
2 Work on manuscript every. single. day.
3 Breathe, be kind to myself, be mindful of creating distracting little projects


JaneB  
- survival

karen 
1. Finish off marking
2. Have complete draft of grass work.
3. Hour and a half on coauthored conference paper draft (already put into calendar)
4. 3 x walk/jogs (I don't think I can call them runs)


KJHaxton
- 3 decent walks at lunchtimes or at dusk (decent = 3 miles)
- use working at home day to make some progress on a potential publication (could be as simple as organising computer and physical workspace and files)
- try not to freak out that it's the first week back and first lecturing since last October.

Matilda (held over)
1. Finish revision of Chapter 1.
2. Finish writing up of the first part of Chapter 2.
3. Do 5 minute exercise every morning.
4. Have more vegetable, less bread.
5. Write my journal every day.
6. Practice writing. - Read a lot, write a lot, look up good dictionaries. Do you have any other practical tips to improve writing?


Waffles 
1. Finish the review I promised to do (okay, start it too!)
2. Outline for PTSD paper
3. Figure out my goals
4. Work on LHF grant revisions (my mentor gave me feedback, I started reading them and burst into tears and haven’t touched it since).






49 comments:

  1. Yesterday I wondered when the new TLQ group was starting, and realized you're in week 4! So I hope you'll let me join late -- perhaps the fact that I disappeared at the end of the last session and didn't pick up till now is a sign of SOMETHING. I'm teaching two courses right now, one a new grad seminar and one a majorly revised version of a course I've taught before, so teaching is not on automatic pilot. I'll post my introduction and session goals here, and also in week 1..

    I'm Susan, a senior faculty member in the humanities at a newish university on the west coast of the US; my research is in the UK, so I am a bit transAtlantic. I'm a widow, living with 3 cats, and also near my 86 year old mother, who is in assisted living and slowly failing. I take on more than my share of administrative tasks, for better or worse. (Which is why I fell off the edge of the world...)

    Session Goals (And I'm making myself feel a bit better by putting in a few things that I have now finished, pretending I started when you did)
    1. Finish Way Outside paper, that was a summer goal
    2. Write article review for journal
    3. Write late book review
    4. Do revise and resubmit
    5. Get regular sleep, aiming for 7 hours a night
    6. Keep moving
    7. Make sure I do one thing for fun each week

    Last week:
    Finished Way Outside paper (this a paper in another discipline and another century from that I work on, hence the title.) There may be a bit of further work, but it's basically done.
    Finished MS. review.
    Went to the symphony last night, so that's fun (and another concert tonight, wOOt!)

    Goals for the week ahead: (Note -TRQ is pretty intense right now)
    - tenure review file
    - Paper grading
    - letter of recommendation
    - Begin reading book for book review

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    Replies
    1. Welcome back, Susan - good to see that you have reappeared!

      Well done on getting Way Outside on its way, and on making time to get to concerts. Every time I hear music live I'm reminded of how intense (and enjoyable) it is to be together, listening.

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    2. Lovely to have you back in the group!

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    3. Great to have you with us again! Welcome!

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    4. Welcome back! Glad you're back. I guess you've reestablished that the world is, indeed, round, and it's possible to reappear on the other horizon after apparently falling off the edge.

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    5. Hi, Susan! Congrats on finishing the "way outside" paper!

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  2. Hello, everyone,

    I have missed two weeks. During that time, I have been doing what? I hope everyone is well.

    Topic:
    The unicorn hunt sounds romantic, concealing practical difficulty…I was thinking of naming my TLQ goal, which at the moment still being far ahead but I want it be realistic. So I think I dream a phoenix-like dream goal, which never dies (I like this part - it is far far far away, but never cease to exist), and my actual session goal is the first step towards my phoenix dream.

    Goals for last two weeks:
    1. Finish revision of Chapter 1.- Partly.
    1-1. Finish writing up of the first part of Chapter 2. - Partly.
    4. Do 5 minute exercise every morning.- Not 5 minutes, but did something everyday.
    5. Have more vegetable, less bread. - Yes, less bread intake.
    6. Write my journal every day. - I have forgot several times.
    7. Practice writing. - Read a lot, write a lot, look up good dictionaries. Do you have any other practical tips to improve writing? - I have tried to write a lot, but sometimes I couldn’t write at all.

    Goal for the next week:
    1. Finish revision and writing Chapter 1.
    1-1. Finish writing draft of Chapter 2.
    4. Do exercise (anything is ok) several times a day.
    5. Have less bread and less biscuits.
    6. Write my journal every day.
    6-1. No e-mails during research time.

    There have been many children-related events these weeks, probably because it was the beginning of the new year. I need to organise my time more efficiently!

    Have a great week, everyone!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Well done on making progress on all your weekly goals, Matilda!

      Finding a way to practice writing that works for what you want that practice to accomplish is an interesting challenge. I often advise my students that reading (with awareness of style as well as content) will help them identify things to try in their own writing. I've found using prompts/questions to write responses helps me when I'm stuck or uncertain.

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    2. I love the idea that the dream remains in that vague and undetermined future so it remain always possible.

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    3. In terms of how to practice writing - well, I guess it depends on what you actually want to accomplish, or where your stumbling blocks are.

      For me, writing begats writing - free-writing for immediate destruction, blogging, scribbled fragments of poetry, outlining, drawing mind maps, even copying stuff I already wrote or quotes from key sources, all help me begin to find words in a catchable form.

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    4. Thank you for your comments! Just write, said my mentor when I saw him recently. Starting with free-writing, writing prompts/questions, and being aware of style when you read...and just write. Every single day is a new day, so I can make a new start with some new ways. Thanks!

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    5. Just writing (and reading) does, I think, work in the long run. Another approach I like, once you have some words on the page, is to try outlining, or any other form of classifying what you have (color-coding, tagging) to begin to try to get a sense of the patterns/arguments that are emerging out of the analysis of evidence.

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    6. Outlining is a good way to make the thoughts clearer. I will try.

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  3. Glad to be back, although full of uncertainty. Or maybe self-doubt. I submitted the grant proposal, I submitted the manuscript revision. I really would like to see both of these things become realities. My unicorn is probably related to the manuscript. I’ve spent ten years studying and following these things that are part of popular culture but strangely have not been critically researched. I feel like I have some expertise in the area, even though I’m a bit burned out on it right now. My secret hope is that my expertise will be acknowledged in certain circles.

    The last two weeks have been about getting those projects done, so today I am in recovery mode. Back to work tomorrow.

    This week:
    1 complete and submit small Park project
    2 get in touch with co-author
    3 review conference papers, round 1
    4 get organized and figure out what to do next

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    Replies
    1. Fingers crossed for both the manuscript and the grant!!! And I hope you do get recognized for your expertise!!!

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    2. Yes--all the best wishes for your work sailing out into the world.

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    3. Ah, recognition, definitely an academic Unicorn!

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  4. I'll need to think about the topic, but want to do a quick check-in and (in keeping with ongoing goals) get to bed more or less on time. So,

    Goals for last week:

    --Lift weights 2x, garden 1x
    --Keep working on more regular bedtime (after I get past the combination of two evening meetings tonight plus teaching tomorrow)
    --Plan follow up on pedagogy project and send group email
    --Rearrange books in apartment to make those relevant to Spring '18 classes more visible/accessible.
    --Pick up at least one book relevant to Spring '18 classes at library

    Accomplished: Gardened (lightly) 1x, made some progress on bedtime, picked up book from library. No progress on weightlifting or book-rearranging.

    Analysis: in setting goals, I forgot that not only the beginning but also the end of the week would be busy (I was basically out all day Saturday). So good enough for the time that was actually available.

    Goals for the coming week (which is actually almost a "normal" week, if such a mythical beast exists):

    --Garden at least 1x, weights 2x; walk at least 1x
    --Continue working toward regular bedtime
    --Send group email re: pedagogy project
    --Send email to regular teacher of upper-level class I will be teaching this spring re: texts, assignments, timing, etc.
    --Rearrange books in apartment to make those relevant to Spring '18 classes more visible/accessible.
    --draw up rough class schedule for Spring '18 so I can begin planning what goes where in both classes

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    Replies
    1. So often the week turns into a chimera of this, that, and the other all mashed together in some unprepossessing way!

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    2. Rearranging the books is a neat idea. I read awhile ago that the Classicist and poet Anne Carson has a desk in her house for each of her projects. While that's an extraordinary luxury, I'd like to do something to create spaces for various research projects. Every semester I assign a different colored folder for each of my classes and it does have an effect about how I think of those classes. hmm.

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    3. Good lord, I'd need either one continuous desk all around the house for the tangle of tentacles as they were being teased out, or about a hundred desks...

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    4. I'm realizing that I definitely not only find it handy to have physical books to which to refer, at least for more serious projects, but that it really helps me to be able to see the spines on a regular basis, as a way of thinking about my research. I've had too many books packed several piles deep on shelves, with sides out (because that's how the most will fit) for some time, and it's annoying and frustrating and even anxiety-making. I have room for more shelves, and I really need to make assembling/building them a priority.

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    5. And the unicorn-goal: get far enough along in my research and writing that I have a realistic chance of successfully applying for a year-long fellowship (and find one that will actually replace my salary, rather than only 1/2 of my salary because they expect my institution to pay the other half, which is standard procedure for tenure-line faculty, but not contingent, teaching-oriented faculty -- in other words, there are more than a few things which make this a unicorn-hunt type goal, though I don't think it's entirely impossible).

      And have other prerequisites in place: finances in good enough order that I don't need summer teaching; apartment in good enough order/shape to be rented for a year.

      It's not impossible, but it felt more possible 5 years ago than it does now, which is a bit discouraging. So how do I get back to where I was 5+ years ago (i.e. doing at least a bit of steady research and writing)? One answer is just doing a bit of it; another is working toward being able to take summers off again (which is also a goal that seems possible, if not immediately so).

      I'm honestly not sure whether I'll get to the fellowship point before I get to retirement (but given that I don't plan to retire for 15-20 years, it's possible).

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  5. Last week’s goals
    1. Finish the review I promised to do (okay, start it too!) - DONE
    2. Outline for PTSD paper - STARTED!
    3. Figure out my goals - - NEED TO DO!
    4. Work on LHF grant revisions (my mentor gave me feedback, I started reading them and burst into tears and haven’t touched it since). - STARTED!

    This week’s goals
    1. Do other review
    2. Finish draft of LHF grant (this has to happen as it goes through mock review next week)
    3. Respond to editor’s comments on aging paper
    4. Get most of the revisions for trans R&R done
    5. Work on PTSD paper some more

    My unicorn might be the first paper out of my NIH F32. The focus is on racial/ethnic differences in my area of study - and I really want to do that topic justice, so I feel anxious about even starting it. Or maybe the unicorn is the manuscript out of my dissertation? My chair keeps pushing me to publish from it and acts as though my entire future depends on that. I am taking part in a manuscript seminar this semester - we each bring one manuscript for the group to give feedback on. I was thinking I might do my diss manuscript as otherwise I'm not sure I will get it done. This might push me to actually do so. The other thing is does is prevent any weird comments about my postdoc area of research (LGBT health). In the first week of the seminar, one of the other participants likened lesbian and bisexual women to homeless psychotic men - so not really looking forward to her comments on my work!

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    Replies
    1. Ummmm what was this person thinking? That's very troubling!

      The manuscript seminar seems like a great opportunity to push yourself to do work that you're inclined to put off; plus, because it's your dissertation, it means that you don't have to write anything new, right?

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    2. I'd second heu mihi on this. I hope there is someone convening the post-doc group who could intervene on the lesbian/bisexual=homeless psychotic... That's just beyond imagination. (I know, it happened. It still boggles the mind.)

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    3. Congrats on starting to look at the mentor feedback! It can be really tricky to take feedback. But remember--it's not about you, it's about the work. All the feedback is to help make it the best grant it can be.

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    4. Sadly the person who made the comment about lesbian and bisexual women is a FACULTY member!!! The group is overseen by a staff person - so the power dynamics aren't really set up for anyone to intervene. I did ask my mentor if we could have someone come in to do some cultural competency trainings - as we have a clinical component to our department (and this faculty member is a clinician).

      Thanks, Amstr! The feedback wasn't rough - it is more about where I am emotionally. This has been a really hard move due to my mentor not having moved here yet, the college not really being set up for postdocs yet, and financial issues (like despite having NIH funds, having no funding to support my research bc the university is taking it all to pay for my health insurance). I've been crying almost every day - so it's a regular occurrence thus far. I'm 100% confident that in a year I will look back at this time and barely remember how it feels now.

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    5. Change is hard, and being unsettled at work and at home, not having a place that feels stable and unpacked and YOURS, is hard. I hope your mentor arrives soon, and puts that not at all smart person into place. AND that the university finds you some funds for your work! (Doesn't the NIH have rules to prevent that sort of thing??)

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    6. Another WTF?!? on the lesbian/bisexual women comment. I *hope* she was having a bad day or an incomplete/incoherent thought, or something along those lines, but I realize that's not the only possibility, even in 2017 in NYC. And yes, one prerequisite for getting good feedback on a draft is having commentators who are willing to take the subject(s) of your research as basically normal and sensible, rather than somehow exotic or outre or scandalous.

      That said (and keeping in mind that I'm in a very different field), I think it's easy to make manuscript(s) that come out of one's diss too much of a unicorn. Publishing (from) a recently-defended diss really is a pretty normal next step (and also -- not to add to the anxiety -- an opportunity that at some point becomes less available, as the research gets stale, and needs to be updated in one way or another). And soon there will be other projects and grants and so on. . . .

      And as long as you realize that this is likely just a bad patch, and will pass, you're increasing the chances that all will work out well.

      In the meantime, is there any chance of seeking out, or even creating, other sources of feedback -- perhaps even some sort of disciplinary (or even interdisciplinary) group of people with similar research interests, drawn from a variety of institutions in your area (or beyond, if people are willing to travel a few times a year, and communicate virtually at other times)? Building your own community, without the complicated politics of a particular department, might be useful, and a worthwhile investment of time at this point in your career.

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  6. At the moment, my fantastical goal is meditating. Work stuff and writing are going fine; it's the stress management and enjoyment of life that are suffering! I'm hoping that this week is the final big push on both tenure and the manuscript, though, and that there will be some more time for spaciousness and rest thereafter....

    Last week:
    1. Read and revise ch. 5 DONE
    2. Draft conclusion DONE
    3. Meditate twice (being realistic, given visitors) NOT DONE, AT ALL
    4. Go for a walk/look out the window most days I THINK SO?
    5. Do prep work for prof. org. project DONE, AND MORE!

    This week:
    I'm going to say it. I plan to...finish and send off my manuscript! It might not happen, though, so I'll itemize the things that need doing:
    1. Enter edits for chapters 2-5
    2. Revise conclusion
    3. Incorporate TM's comments on intro
    4. Create bibliography
    5. Format and send
    Oh, and: 6. Meditate as many times as I can manage, whatever that may be.

    There's a whole lot of other stuff that I need to do, but I'm just going to leave that right there as it is.

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    Replies
    1. Good luck! I am always in awe of how much you accomplish. Especially packing up, selling, buying, and moving with a small child in tow.

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    2. Ditto!

      Best of luck on making good progress (and maybe even sending off) the manuscript this week!

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  7. I have started to feel that ALL my big goals (move, write book) are unicorns. However, the unicorn imagery is a happier way to think about their elusiveness than is running myself down for not (yet) achieving them, and I also like Matilda's phoenix idea. They still burn within me, though they look like a pile of ashes.

    How I did:
    1) Self: daily exercise, yoga (2x, preferably), enough sleep, work on at least 2 languages, do the necessary cooking so I can eat safely. YES (still working on 2x/day for yoga, but I did that twice, and once on 5 days). Sleep was a little iffy, but I'm getting by.
    2) Research: 5 hours, focusing on product. YES. I hope to put all the revised bits together and work on transitions. NOT YET.
    3) Teaching: finish setting up assignments for undergrads. YES.
    4) House/Life: finish packing the guest room (NO), do some other useful house thing (YES: packed the master closet instead, + paid a couple of bills early).

    That was a pretty good week. I managed to work ahead in a few areas, knowing that I have grading coming in this week. I had hoped to do some work at the weekend, but that went to House and to Unexpected Events. One of my old neighbors has a cat who has recently been diagnosed with advanced kidney disease as well as thyroid trouble; the owner is distraught, and called me for advice. So I've been going over there to help with sub-cu fluids and
    so on. It looks to me like this cat is pretty sick, but not done yet, so I'll help out as long as I can. He's a sweet kitty; he's 12 or 13, so he's had a decent run, if we can't pull him through. Dealing with the cat and the owner, though, came with a huge side order of guilt and regret about ever having moved (if we'd been there to observe symptoms, to offer advice, to help with medicating, could this have been diagnosed and treated sooner?). I've had to have stern talks with myself about Superwoman Syndrome, and the number of cats and their owners in the world who are, somehow, managing without my invaluable expertise.

    Goals for this week:
    1) Self: daily exercise, yoga (2x, preferably), enough sleep, work on at least 2 languages, do the necessary cooking so I can eat safely.
    2) Research: 5 hours, focusing on product. I hope to put all the revised bits together and work on transitions, maybe get it to the point where I can ask a friend to look it over.
    3) Teaching: grade two sets of assignments.
    4) House/Life: finish packing the guest room, get discards out of the house, book holiday travel.

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    Replies
    1. House stuff can just take over, can't it? Or be a huge pain while you're trying to get other stuff done. I've still got unpacking to do from interior house painting this summer, and I'm dreaming of re-doing part of our bathroom, but I don't think I have the bandwidth for it.

      I always admire your ability to work consistently on projects. You will get it done!

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    2. Every time I move, I find myself unable to imagine ever again *not* being in the process of moving, or not thinking ceaselessly about where to get boxes and whatnot. You have my sympathy.

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    3. Moving (from storage in my case), and simply moving around stuff within my household, is definitely one of the places I very easily get hung up. I can do it, but, like heu mihi, I find it completely takes over the brain space I habitually use for other things, like keeping track of the details of the courses I'm teaching. It think it's the recurring issue of mental load, which is distinct from the issue of time available.

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    4. You are so sweet to help your former neighbor. Still, it's true that you can't be there to shepherd all of the cats along with their owners. You just can't.

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    5. Thanks, GEW. It helps to hear it from someone else. When I was a little girl, I wanted to adopt All The Cats, and I still wish I could help them all . . . or at least this one, and then this one, and pretty soon I'm back to All The Cats instead of focusing on what's at hand and do-able.

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  8. Unicorn goals: my big one is to lose 20 lbs. I'm willing to talk about it in terms of eating and exercise habits and goals (because those I can control), but really, I'd like to lose the weight. My second big one is to publish a children's book (and develop a career of it). Again, I feel like I can talk about the particular steps I can take toward it because I have control over those.

    Here's what I have to say about my goals for the week. HAHAHAHAHAHA!! (more articulate analysis below)
    Goals
    -plan eating/menus and eat well--ate fairly well for not planning
    -1 hour coffee shop writing 5 days--maybe once?
    -finalize YB--so close!
    -redraft PO--nada
    -finish KLB handouts--yes, but it was really TLQ
    -revise RB--got feedback and ideas, but no revision yet
    -draft 10 pages of MF--funny.
    -finish goals by Friday pm--HAHAHA

    This week turned into crazy TRQ. I had a foot X-ray on Monday for a foot injury from a month ago (just a bad sprain--with 4-6 more weeks of healing left), my daughter had high anxiety about leaving for a school overnight trip, she injured her toe Monday, cried on the way to the bus Tuesday, hiked on a hurt foot Tues and Wed, and I picked her up Wed night. So Thursday and Friday were full--mostly with childcare. I'm also teaching a continuing studies class over the next two weekends with a colleague who has quite a different style from mine, so it's been challenging (and mostly good) to figure out how to work well together. We did a lot of work on the course over the summer, but we're entering TLQ time, including a 4.5 hour meeting today. So this past week was just what happens when life intervenes. Back to TLQ this week, I hope!

    Goals for the week:
    -plan menus and grocery shop
    -exercise 4x
    -in bed by 10:30pm most nights
    -10 pages of MF
    -rev 2 PB manuscripts

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  9. Fantastical goal is to be normal, healthy, valued, balanced, good at what I do and good at achieving the metrics that make other people regard me as good at what I do (NOT the same thing). To be one of those elves who is beautiful and wise and All The Things (also frequently they get to stay in their lovely place and make High Art whilst other people go on adventures, fall in swamps, get bitten by bugs etc. Lothlorien as an Ivory Tower, elves as the Ivy League/Golden Triangle elite... on a side note, if you don't know the "lord of the rings as an allegory for the PhD" go read it here). Instead I'm something clumpen and tangled who might get a few lines, eventually, and possibly a mention in the epilogue as part of the group who, I don't know, set up a tavern or went back to being a groundskeeper...

    Anyway, last week was not great. Very stressful, my voice found a new way to mess me around (laryngeal spasms, instead of losing my voice fully for days, it and my breathing siezed up for a second or so repeatedly. Not fun). Took Thursday off, worked Friday with someone else covering my lecture so I could go to the GP and be told it was "stress", tried extra anti-anxiety stuff, and now instead of being on a field trip focused on one thing and feeling capable, I'm working from home and doing a bit of wallowing.

    Oh well. Maybe I can at least get ahead on some teaching stuff before it becomes TRQ. Not in the mood to set goals, so... may come back later & do that, when I'm not in quite such a lump on a bump kind of mood!

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    Replies
    1. So was this the week of the BIG FIELD TRIP you've been planning? And are you missing it?

      Well, the good news is that your TLQ goal was to survive and you seem to have done that, if just barely.

      And, also, you are (as I've said before) such a good writer. I'm sorry this writing is about not being a wise elf, but it's still such good writing.

      I hope you are able to rest and recover and feel less tangled.

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  10. A lot of my big goals feel a bit unicornish. Part of my problem is that several of my big, potential goals will be very difficult, and I just haven't decided how dedicated I am. The first is publishing an article (or two), the second is committing to fiction. I think I really do want to work on fiction. It's been a goal all of my life, and I think it will be rewarding regardless of the outcome. As for the research, my current circumstances make it challenging, and I just can't decide how much I want it.

    Also, I've had a lot of fatigue lately, an unusual type of fatigue, that seems to have come with the shingles. And this fatigue makes things seem even more difficult.

    Last week's goals:
    1) Pay bills. SOME DONE.
    2) Try to embrace my job (I've been resenting its demands this semester, but it's time to remember that I'm getting paid, and I need to get on board and think postively.) DONE.
    3) Finish course proposal for science fiction class. DONE.
    4) Write: 15 minutes x 5 (actual writing). SOME DONE. 3x.
    5) two walks, one swim, daily stretching (even if stretching is just two minutes) morning and evening NOT DONE
    6) do some planning for middle school writing group (the first meeting was today--VERY SCARY, but fun!) DONE

    I forgot about stretching, and squeezing in exercise has been difficult, especially with the fatigue.

    This week's goals:
    1) Finish paying bills.
    2) Make reservations for next week's conference. Excited about this one b/c it's at a great library I've wanted to go to for a long time, but also feeling hesitant about the time and energy to make the trip. I should really see it through though.
    3) Write 15 minutes (or 200 words) 5x.
    4) Walk 20 minutes 3x. Stretch daily.
    5) Print dissertation chapter for considering re-reading/revision plans.
    6) Prepare and present a good post-sabbatical report for the college BOT.
    7) Enjoy the kids while hubby is out of town part of the weekend!

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    1. I can relate to your pull to write fiction. I suspect you would find it rewarding, especially if it has been a longterm goal. I've known some folks who use their acholarly research as a framework for their fiction--maybe that would work for you? Or just write a few sentences a day, if writing the whole piece feels overwhelming.
      I hope you felt up to going to the conference--I feel so much better after a trip to a good library.

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  11. Topic: My fantastical beast of a goal-- I like Matilda’s phoenix, and especially Dame Eleanor’s evocation of banked ashes -- would be getting my fiction out there. I suppose I would also like some recognition for the medieval studies work I have done, but the banked ashes really hide the fiction. I have scribbled all my life, but have only put my hand to the wheel of the craft for the past half-dozen years or so. It still scares the breath out of me, so it is still a distant goal.

    Last week's goals:
    Create the tables for the survey article.
    Edit the survey article without ticking off my co-authors.
    Update my CV for the sabbatical application.
    Spend at least six hours on the grant.
    Organize, toss or scan one file drawer.
    Continue to expand project file with one folder per project.
    Walk more than 45 minutes a day.
    Edit at least five pages of the book.
    Write at least four pages of the novella.
    Transfer the outdoor plants to the winter pots, even if it was 90F today

    Analysis: Last week, I was still hyperfocussed until Friday, when I crashed. By Sunday, although I did everything on the list of goals, I was overcooked linguine and did nothing but read novels and knit. Well, yesterday, I had several doctors’ appointments in NYC, so I did make those, but all my plans to work on the train were for naught. I am tearing through my TBR pile, though. My goals will be spare and easy since the week is nearly gone.

    Next (This) week’s goals:
    Turn in sabbatical application.
    Edit at least five pages of the book.
    Write at least four pages of the novella.
    Walk more than 45 minutes a day.
    .
    The leaves are turning in my neck of the woods, and the train ride along the Hudson is breathtaking these days. Excelsior, everyone. Be the stone, the water, or the mist.

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