Week 6 Check-In: Negotiating with Others

Looking over last week's check-ins, I'm seeing a theme: the need to negotiate goals and priorities with others.  Several of us noted that teaching and admin taks tend to be "noisier" than activities that advance our TLQ goals because they involve other people, and their needs and wants and preferences and priorities.  Some of us are finding it hard to set priorities and schedules, and get on with tasks (TLQ or otherwise) because we have to wait for input from others (collaborators, supervisors, family members, etc.).  And some have family members (partners, children, and/or parents) whose needs and priorities (and possible emergencies) have to be factored, and re-factored, into our plans.   Finally,  more than a few of us suspect there may be a gendered component to how we, and others, approach these issues. 

So, your topic for this week, should you choose to address it, is how you negotiate/balance goals, priorities, schedules, etc. with those of other people (professional colleagues, family/partner/friends, or both).  Do you find this a particular difficult area of life to manage?  Have you developed any strategies for negotiating these balancing acts successfully? 

Here's a reminder of the standard format for check-ins:

1. comment on the week's topic. 
2. report your progress against last week's goals
3. analysis (optional): analyse what happened, what went well, what came up to derail things, note what you learnt/want to change, ask any questions of the rest of the group if you want some tips or suggestions
4. planning (optional): something about the coming week: what the priorities are, what issues are going to present challenges, what the framework for your goal-setting is
5. goals for the next week (or multi-week period until your next check-in)


Last week's goals:
 allan wilson
1. Exercise four times
2. Begin work on CR
3. Send other nearly finished paper to colleagues for comment

Amstr
1) exercise 5x
2) write 3x
3) agent/query/spreadsheet progress
4) cover letters
5) nightly planning session

Contingent Cassandra
1) Make at least some progress on financial/household tasks most days (at least 4 days, preferably more)
2) Swim at least twice (preferably more often), walk at least twice, work on garden/move mulch no more than 3 days.
3) Touch base w/ family member; spend time w/ friends (this last one is sort of built in, since there's a scheduled event)

Daisy (still away this week, I believe, but carrying 3-week goals forward)
1) Work on writing projects at least 30 minutes every day
2) Keep up reading project
3) Make better field notes than last year because for the love of pete I wish I could go back and slap my former self silly for taking terrible notes!!!

Elizabeth (carried over from week 4)
1) Another of the critiques came in for the co-authored article, so I plan to work on those edits.
2) I’m only going to try for walking three times this week, as I still feel somewhat shaky.
3) Two recipes for healthy food, as I am still trying to fool the family into eating better.

GEW
1) Make a plan/agreement with Hubby for work time.
2) Procure daughter's camp materials
3) Read four articles/book chapters for current draft
4) write at least 1,000 words, incorporating references to chapters/articles read
5) Try not to sob uncontrollably when daughter gets on the camp bus on Sunday

humming42
1) Send off book proposal. Colleague says it’s all good and I should just send it. So I will.
2) Write to Overdue Project editor.
3) Work every day on Upcoming Article.
4) Begin reading book for book review.

There will be more painting and with hope, an escape day with Traveling Friend in Nearby City at the of the week. 


iwantzcatbocl
1) Work on text for chapters 2, 3 and 4.
2) Finish chapter 2.
3) Get deep into chapter 3 (it is a long one).
4. Go to Favorite Café every day
3. exercise 4 times
4. make flight arrangements for flight at end of summer for big trip
5. prepare progress toward tenure letters (all of them, because they are due Friday!)
6. check in with TLQ group!

JaneB
1) start some decluttering in areas where I will see results quickly!
2) be Good in the meeting on Friday
3) compose an email to my Head of Department asking about the things he has not replied to me about all semester and which are bugging me (already done this morning but going here as it took a lot of thought and editing. needless to say, no reply...)
4) write a series of one-pagers for papers that want attention, and do some assessment of what work would be involved in each/which ones I want to work on most. Oh, and give them nicknames, there has to be a fun stage right?
5) reacquaint myself with my NaNo writing, and write a little. 

Karenh
1. 30 minutes writing time because, damn it, I can find at least that.
2. Bring in food to work to allow good food choices. 

kjhaxton (carried over from week 4)
1. Finish as much marking as possible on Thursday and Friday.
2. continue the list making and planning habits,
3. start to write a small amount each day.
 
Let's Do This
1. submit another article! I pulled a short section out of my book manuscript, one related to a new finding in the non-literary writings of my book's subject, and I'm going to try to get it published ahead of the book. My goal is to submit this one by Monday but would be happy with Wednesday.
2. Take care of some lingering bills from pregnancy.
3. Clean up some videos my students and I made for a grant project, so I can post them and notify the money-givers.
4. Continue to clean the house. My parents will be here in 3 weeks, and I'd like it to look better than it did in the throes of new babyhood last time they were here (when the baby was just 2 weeks old).
5. Play board games with my daughter at least twice this week. It's a little thing that she just loves. 


Matilda
1) To continue to revise Chapter 1.
2) To continue to read important articles relating to Chapter 1.
3) To exercise for 3 minutes after one working session (that is, 25 minutes)
4) To have less snacks, both day and night.  

Mercy
a. read/comment on 1 MA and 1 BA thesis
b. read/comment on 1 admin report as it comes back
c. museum visits w/house guests (took 3 days off for this)
d. reading goal of 1 HA-related article on 4 days
e. meeting w/TAs for next year's course (could not wait till Sep. after all)
 
Susan 
1. Finish book review
2. Fix expenses for trip
3. Go back to the introduction, and see what I need to add/ change etc.
4. Read through the whole thing one more time.
5. Exercise daily 

week 5 check in: What Not To Drop

Hello everyone, hope you've all had a good and productive week, and not been either washed away or burnt to a crisp!  Last week we talked about adjusting our plans, and the week before we talked about dealing with the unexpected.  In both cases, we ended up talking about dropping things and saying no, whether to others or just to ourselves, and about how easy it is to let TLQ things be the things that are allowed to slide.  I've been re-reading the Fergus O'Connell book I've mentioned before, and once again struck by how attractive his basic message is - you can't do it all, so you should only do the things which really matter, and do them well - and how hard it is to put into practice (especially to put into practice whilst being female, I suspect). 

I've been trying to make better use of the Three Things idea this week, identifying three key tasks for the day.  I've realised one of my 'issues' around this is that I feel like they all ought to be work things, and if they aren't, I'm not working hard enough.  Yesterday my three things were: "referee a paper [which was overdue], make cakes [for real-life writing group] and go to the gym".  I actually struggled to make myself write those as my three things - they looked really self-indulgent, like a weekend day almost, not a work day.  In the event, clearing the refereeing first thing in the morning felt good, the baking and the gym were productive and self-nurturing things to do when I began to lose focus on the email and other stuff I was doing with my work time, and having my Three Things done by mid-afternoon felt great (and actually some more work got done almost by accident in the evening and progress was made on most items on the wider list, not just the top three).

This exercise made me realise how often I put off the really important stuff in life, both in the academic achieving things sense (writing that Counts) and in the self-care sense - despite this group, and all the sensible things I say to others, and the training and reading I've done, urgent wins.  TRQ and BRQ things are loud, in my face, and giving in to them is often the easy choice; but not the wisest one.  Important doesn't always mean easy (something else that came up in the comments - sometimes TLQ is postponed because it Has Baggage), but if my students complained that things are Too Hard, I'd not exactly be sympathetic!  This coming week I'm going to try and focus on only the tasks that have to be done by ME, and only the ones that have effects which I will care about in a year's time - and that includes things that support my health and well-being, but EXcludes things like, oh, writing the best and most detailed referee report I can, or going to a lot of meetings...

Topic: how do you decide what not to drop when stuff gets tough?  Are you good at making smart choices, or does TLQ slip away so you find yourself looking back at the past months or years wondering what you did, rather than admiring the papers written and gardens created?  Any suggestions for how we can renew our committments to do what matters most, to care for ourselves and our loved ones and 'attend to our muses' (or whatever the academic-writerly equivalent is) and deliver on the parts of our jobs which matter most rather than those that shout the loudest?

Last week's goals:

Academic Amstr

1) exercise 3x
2) start evening routine, daily (next day's activity plan, next day's food plan, next day's work plan, etc.)
3) write 3x
4) cover letter SFDs for two jobs
5) prep list of first 5 agents to query, get query spreadsheet organized
6) take care of pesky I-9 form for job

Allan Wilson

1. Exercise four times
2. Begin work on CR
3. Send other nearly finished paper to colleagues for comment

Contingent Cassandra

Exercise each day (walk, swim, or move mulch, preferably 2 of 3).
2) Substantial progress on financial paperwork *and* at least one household task with financial implications.
3) Touch base w/ family member and one colleague; send another card. 

Daisy (away for three weeks)
1) Work on writing projects at least 30 minutes every day
2) Keep up reading project
3) Make better field notes than last year because for the love of pete I wish I could go back and slap my former self silly for taking terrible notes!!!

Elizabeth (carried over from week 4)
1) Another of the critiques came in for the co-authored article, so I plan to work on those edits.
2) I’m only going to try for walking three times this week, as I still feel somewhat shaky.
3) Two recipes for healthy food, as I am still trying to fool the family into eating better.

Good Enough Woman

1) Walk three times. Swim once.
2) Write 1500 words.
3) Finish re-reading primary source
4) Read 100 pages of secondary source material
5) procure necessary items for daughter's sleep away camp (and avoid freaking out over the fact that she is going to sleep away camp, and avoid worrying that she is going for the wrong reasons--to bond with a "best friend" who has been neglecting her--and that the whole thing could go terribly).
 

Humming42

1) One more go at finishing teaching-related tasks from spring.
2) Send out call for proposals for edited collection project.
3) Write deadlines/schedule for upcoming article (which also needs a code name).
4) Start work on So Overdue Project.

iwantzcatbocl

1) Work on text for chapters 1, 1a and 2.
2. go to campus and take care of administrative stuff over two days
3. exercise 4 times
4. make flight arrangements for flight at end of summer for big trip
5. prepare progress toward tenure letters (half of them)
6. check in with TLQ group!
 
JaneB

1) get Crunchier and Crunchier's Little Brother to the point where they can be sent off to persnickety co-author (who will get actual pleasure out of formatting them for submission and moving the commas around in the reference list. Because he is wierd, but hey, it's a useful kind of wierd!)
2) this time REALLY get administrative stuff done as far as possible, then just STOP.
3) send emails, or at least a proper list of the emails that need sending, from the workshop and last Friday's meeting.
4) calendar review, cattery bookings (which I still haven't done! Aargh!), and being Nice To Jane

karenh

1. P1 - do the horrible contacting people job, and get 1 hour of playing in digital archives as reward.
2. P2 - finish up notes for 2 articles
3. One form of physical activity on top of physio exercises- probably swimming or a yoga class, as this close to solstice morning/evening walk is distinctly unappealing.
4. Restrict evening marking to 2 rounds of pomodoro.

kjhaxton (carried over from week 4)
1. Finish as much marking as possible on Thursday and Friday.
2. continue the list making and planning habits,
3. start to write a small amount each day. 

Let’sDoThis

1. Submit the article. I am SO close and the deadline is tomorrow (though they've extended it to July 15th). This WILL be done ... almost momentarily.
2. Finish grading some senior projects. I'm technically on leave with the baby, but senior projects stop for no woman. These are due Tuesday,
3. Finish grading a few writing exams I picked up for some $$. These are due tomorrow.
4. Get the summer proper under way ... swimming etc. for daughter, infant stuff for infant!
5. And continue to clean the house! This basically means get rid of stuff. 

Matilda

1) to revise the first part of Chapter 1.
2) to read 3 important articles for the book.
3) to exercise for 5 minutes several times a day.
4) to eat less snacks at night. 

Mercy

a. get the grading for last semester out of the way and DON'T start teaching prep for next semester
b. reading goal for HA paper: 5 articles on 5 days
c. writing goal for HA paper: 3 poms on 3 days
d. do NOT do goal: don't check email first thing in the morning
e. go to bed earlier!!
f. take lunch walks at work or after-dinner walks w/oldest kids

Susan

1. Desk organizing/clearing so I can see it.
2. Bibliography refs.
3. Make Dentist appointment
4. Other emails/ calls re house
5. Read book for book review
6. Book for teaching next year

Week 4 Check-In: Adjusting as Necessary

Welcome back!  Now that we've been at this about a month, and have talked a bit about how we plan, and how we plan for/cope with the unexpected, I'm thinking that it might be time not for a major reassessment of goals, but for a bit of reflection and, if necessary, adjustment.

So, if you choose, you might start out your post by reflecting on what's going well, and what might need adjustment (either modifying or dropping a goal, or coming up with a new way to insure that an essential TLQ goal doesn't get lost, either in the day-to-day pressure of TRQ concerns, or because of a focus on other TLQ goals, or . . .?).

Then there's the usual check-in:

2. report your progress against last week's goals
3. analysis (optional): analyse what happened, what went well, what came up to derail things, note what you learnt/want to change, ask any questions of the rest of the group if you want some tips or suggestions
4. planning (optional): something about the coming week: what the priorities are, what issues are going to present challenges, what the framework for your goal-setting is
5. goals for the next week (or multi-week period until your next check-in)


Last week's goals:

allan wilson
1. Exercise four times
2. encourage myself toward goal one
3. Make a list of tasks for CR
4. Finish paper whk. this will mostly involve encouraging my collaborator to do the work required which is holding the paper up. and, tightening up the suppl. mat, and checking a spreadsheet. I hope to achieve all (very optimistically!).

Amstr (goals from week 2)
1) write 3 days
2) rough drafts of 2 job apps
3) gather info for letters of rec; email Kind Advisor
4) exercise 3x 

Contingent Cassandra
1) get into a more regular exercise habit, especially swimming and walking (preferably both, but at least one, each day)
2) make progress on financial paperwork; other household tasks w/ financial angle
3) get in touch w/ at least one other friend and one colleague re: getting together; send a family card; touch base w/ a family member. 

Daisy (goals for 3 weeks she'll be away; next check-in 2 weeks hence)
1) Work on writing projects at least 30 minutes every day
2) Keep up reading project
3) Make better field notes than last year because for the love of pete I wish I could go back and slap my former self silly for taking terrible notes!!!

Elizabeth
1) Another of the critiques came in for the co-authored article, so I plan to work on those edits.
2) I’m only going to try for walking three times this week, as I still feel somewhat shaky.
3) Two recipes for healthy food, as I am still trying to fool the family into eating better.


GEW
1) Walk twice. Swim once.
2) Finish primary source
3) Read two more secondary articles or chapters
4) Write 750 words
5) Help kids celebrate the end of the school year.

humming42
1) One more go at finishing teaching-related tasks from spring.
2) Write call for proposals for edited collection project.
3) Write deadlines/schedule for upcoming article (which also needs a code name)
4) Start work on So Overdue Project

iwantzcatbocl (goals from week 2)
1. Make outline for June
2. Do fieldwork
3. Write some on Tuesday and Sunday (at least two hours).
4. finish some admin
5. try to be patient with grad students

JaneB
1) complete all urgent administrivia stuff, and leave the rest 'parked downhill' for picking up in September
2) redo the analyses for the report that is not really my problem
3) Go through notes from workshop and from Friday meeting, and email as necessary
4) keep a mood and self-care diary, to collect data (try again...)
5) work through the rest of the comments on Crunchier and start on Crunchier's Little Brother
6) bed before midnight!  

Karenh
1. STILL! P1 Admin list and knock off 1 hour of items.
2. Read and note-take 2 articles for P2.
3. Physio exercises 4 x week
4. Sanity break one night per week - either music practice or crafting

kjhaxton
1. Finish as much marking as possible on Thursday and Friday.
2. continue the list making and planning habits,
3. start to write a small amount each day.

Let's Do This (goals from Week 3)
1. Submit the article. sub-goals: reformatting into Chicago style, completing manuscript study at the archive, cleaning up prose, completing work-in of survey results, and sitting on it for a day or two
2. Re-read books 1 and 2. I plan to do this as a way to take breaks from finishing up the article. I might just have to give up on this one for the week, though.
3. Attend an award ceremony. I'm delighted to report that I won a teaching award! Yay!
4. Welcome my sister to town! She'll be here for two weeks. The plan is that this will not disrupt my writing goals. We shall see. Can't say I'll care too much if her visit does disrupt the goals. :)


Matilda
1) to make a plan and to start working on Chapter 1.
2) to read the important articles for Chapter 1 revision.
3) to revise my documents for the committee.
4) to exercise for 5 minutes when I have time.
5) to have less sweets at night.  

Mercy
a. finalize my share of admin docs that have come back from collegial imput
b. write for at least 2 poms on HA paper on 3 days this week
c. spend at least 3 poms reading for HA paper 5 days this week
d. spend time walking/riding bike outside 5 days this week
e. move bedtime to earlier time!

Susan 
1. Add in a few stray references in intro based on ILL books
2. Go back to two messiest chapters to see where they are
3. Fix refs on ILL book due Thursday
4. Make dentist appointment
5. Email editor, contributors, re. collection of essays
6. Work through old essays that need to be entered into bibliography
7. Walk or garden 5 days. 

Week 3 checkin

Hello everyone, hope you all had a good week!

This is a little late because my home internet went off five minutes after I walked in the door last night and has only just come back - there again an internet free Friday night and Saturday morning was a great reason to read a novel on the back doorstep in the sun after breakfast this morning, so your late check-in was my very pleasant start to the weekend!).

Topic: expecting the unexpected
Last wekk, karenh said: "I really need to stop planning my weeks as though everything will run smoothly and that I will be super-efficient at all times because those things never happen." This clearly struck a chord with others, GEW suggested adding 30-60 minutes to each day's plan for 'unexpected' things.  I actually compared my diary and my done list for a couple of  weeks during the teaching semester and reckoned that typically 3 hours of my day were spent on 'unplanned' things like talking to colleagues, dealing with email, "fire-fighting", opening the locked committee room next to me office for people who had it booked but didn't have the right key (it seems mean to make them walk all the way back to the front desk for a key when I have one and when I've already been interrupted, but it does add up...). 

So, this week, let's talk about planning for the real world. Do you divide your list into 'must' and 'would like to'?  Do you manage to plan about the right amount of work, or are you an eternally disappointed optimist?  Have you any tips to share?

Building such semi-predictable 'unexpected' into your planning was one of the very useful suggestions from one of my favourite "self-improvement" books, 'How To Do a Great Job and Go Home On Time' by Fergus O'Connell - I partly like this book because it begins by pointing out that time management courses (and efficiency rhetoric) tend to be based on the flawed premise that you CAN do 'all the things', whereas that just isn't true.  It emphasises working out priorities, planning your time realistically, and valuing and making space for your non-work life, and includes advice on how to handle the inevitable push-back from other people when you need to say no to stuff.  It's 'spin' on the 'Getting Things Done' folders idea is great - it suggests daily folders for tasks etc., but also suggests that you put the number of hours you have for planned tasks on the front of each - so if I work an 8 hour day and know I typically 'lose' two hours to unplanned tasks, I put 6 hours on the front - then every time you allocate a task, you deduct the time it will take... (so I have class, deduct 1 hour (5), I need to mark these essays, deduct 2 hours (3), I have a meeting, deduct 1.5 hours (1.5), I need half an hour to write, deduct 30 minutes (1)) - you get to zero AWFULLY quickly, but that helps you make realistic lists - and days that go well, when you either get to leave early or to start an item from the NEXT day's list, can be very satisfying.  Of course, I can't use the system consistently, because I never use ANY system consistently, but that is my problem not the systems'!

Here's a reminder of the standard format for check-ins:

1. comment on the week's topic, when there is one
2. report your progress against last week's goals
3. analysis (optional): analyse what happened, what went well, what came up to derail things, note what you learnt/want to change, ask any questions of the rest of the group if you want some tips or suggestions
4. planning (optional): something about the coming week: what the priorities are, what issues are going to present challenges, what the framework for your goal-setting is
5. goals for the next week (or multi-week period until your next check-in)

Goals from last week:

allan wilson (goals copied from week 2 checkin)
1. Exercise four times
2. encourage myself toward goal one
3. Make a list of tasks for CR

Amstr (goals copied from week 2 checkin)
1) write 3 days
2) rough drafts of 2 job apps
3) gather info for letters of rec; email Kind Advisor
4) exercise 3x 

Contingent Cassandra:
1) get into a more regular exercise habit, especially swimming and walking (preferably both, but at least one, each day)
2) make progress on financial paperwork
3) get in touch w/ friends re: getting together; try to figure out how to stay in touch w/ family members in middle of delicate situation


Daisy:
1) Finish text edits on lingering paper L2

2) Send L2 to helpful readers

2) Find all field gear, and buy anything needed - do not leave until next weekend!

3) Set up research students to work without me

4) Keep up reading project

Elizabeth

1) Read and take notes on one article.

2) Walk for half an hour 5 times.

3) Try out two of the healthy recipes, to see if I can fool the men in the house.

Good Enough Woman:
1) Finish prepping for daughter's b-day. (This includes repainting a piano bench I found on the side of the road. I'm going to do it up in fun colors.)
2) Be present for the kids during this "mommy week" while hubby is gone.
3) Each evening, set a schedule for the next day.
4) Exercise 4 times (swim at least once).
5) Finish re-reading primary source.
6) read two articles or book chapters
7) purge boxes of stuff from the cabinets of the bathroom that hubby demoed.

humming42:

1) FInish Em Proposal and send off.

2) Finish teaching-related task from spring.

3) Bring in books from the garage.

4) Begin 10 minute mindfulness pledge (do some mindfulness activity for ten minutes every day).

iwantzcatbocl (goals copied from week 2 checkin)
1. Make outline for June
2. Do fieldwork
3. Write some on Tuesday and Sunday (at least two hours).
4. finish some admin
5. try to be patient with grad students

JaneB:

1) complete all marking leftovers from the semester 

2) check out a technical problem with a dataset in the lab, and correct the spreadsheet and analyses as necessary
3) Go through the notes from the workshop and email as necessary, put in workshop expenses claim
4) keep a mood and self-care diary, to collect data 

5) work through the comments on Crunchier and if time Crunchier's Little Brother
6) bed before midnight!

karenh:

1. P1 Admin list and as many items as can be knock off in a hour.

2. P2 Make a list of possible journals that Embodied paper could find a home in, 15 min writing 3x week on it.

3. Bed alarm clock continue

4. Try physio exercise in office 4 x week

kjhaxton (goals copied from week 2 checkin)
1. Finish as much marking as possible, what is not done by home time Thursday will be done on Wednesday.
2.  continue the list making and planning habits,
3.  start to write a small amount each day.

Let'sDoThis:
1. Submit the article. sub-goals: reformatting into Chicago style, completing manuscript study at the archive, cleaning up prose, completing work-in of survey results, and sitting on it for a day or two
2. Re-read books 1 and 2. I plan to do this as a way to take breaks from finishing up the article. I might just have to give up on this one for the week, though.
3. Attend an award ceremony. I'm delighted to report that I won a teaching award! Yay!
4. Welcome my sister to town! She'll be here for two weeks. The plan is that this will not disrupt my writing goals. We shall see. Can't say I'll care too much if her visit does disrupt the goals. :)

Matilda:

1) to make a plan of the revision of Chapter 1.

2) to read two important articles. 

3) to exercise for 5 minutes when I have time. 

4) to have less sweets, less snacks at night.

Mercy:
a. grade student posters w/colleague (try to be quick about it!)
b. attend talk and take speaker to dinner
c. grade MA res props
d. delegate/ignore/say No to all other tasks that randomly crop up this week
e. find time to work on HA paper each day, w/goal of SFD for writing group

Susan:

1. Get rough draft of introduction finished. This is rough -- it may include places where my paragraph says the equivalent of "Here be dragons", but it should be sketched so that I can fill in the blanks.
2. Write editor about my book
3. Write editor about collection of essays
4. Write potential contributors
5. Make a bunch of phone calls
6. Get ticket for my mother's travel this summer
7. Book B & B where I'll take a few days of real vacation
8. Walk at least 4 day