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Saturday 13 February 2016

Week 6 Things we've done right

Good morning everyone!
Many of us have had a few very rough weeks this year already for many reasons. The year feels like it has been quite long already, despite being only a month and a half old... It is now the middle of February, the time in the year where I start getting cabin fever and winter blahs, and it is really showing in my work and my level of engagement with writing. I think we can use a bit of cheer-leading and sparkles...

For this week's topic you have to make a list of five (yes 5!) things that you have done since January 1st that you are proud of. It can be anything, a new habit, a completed piece of work or crafts, the pile of chocolate that did not get eaten in a huff, anything...
Now of course we're usually pretty reluctant about doing something like that, so here is the alternative: make a list of 5 things you did since January; things that if a friend had done them, you'd be telling her/him that you are impressed or proud :)


On to the goals from last week now!
Report in with the usual format for goals for last week, new goals, and discussion.

allan wilson
1. Physical health: exercise (walk) at least 4x
2. Mental health: spend half an hour a day on my own, without interruptions, every day
3. Family: go to son's sports day for half a day. Cook a really nice dinner once.
4. Work: TLQ - look at, examine and reconstruct if necessary, 5 year goals.
5. Also, TRQ- write request for a piece of equipment, which first requires email conversation with overseas colleague that may or may not be productive
5. Fun: I can't even think of anything here, but imagine it will probably cross over with my half hour alone each day.

Contingent Cassandra
1. Fit in more regular exercise
2. Keep working on establishing bedtime routine
3. Continue work on boxes
4. Try to take a full day off

Daisy
ONLY Revisions - again and ongoing...
Lots of grading and other teaching things this week so I'm picking any others.

Danne
Write for three pomodori every day (only one today, to get started).
Reread and submit on Sunday/Monday morning.
Also, do not forget to prepare a conference proposal for Friday.
Do some creative writing, if possible.

Elizabeth Anne Mitchell: (from Week 3)
Write at least 500 words and clean up a page of footnotes on the critical edition. I am still keeping this one on deck, despite my failures so far.
Finish outlining the short story.
Do better with commenting and responding on this post. Although I have read everyone’s comments last week, I haven’t responded. My apologies!

Earnest English
1. Research: Write at least 3x for half hour. Work on article revisions.
2. Health: Here I need to be good to my leg and take my supplements and generally be very good to myself when it comes to food and stress.
3. Read: Bring a book for the plane and to help go to sleep.
4. Family: Love them this weekend.
5. Herbalism: Nothing doing on this front.
6. Work: I'm taking grading with me on my trip, and I'd like to get at least five projects done per day. I also have some short pieces to grade, and I'd like to get those done also, but that might be a bit much. I also need to prep Friday while I'm gone.

Good Enough Woman
1) Drink fluids and sleep enough to prevent worsening of cold.
2) Finish conference paper and slides (this will be TRQ soon)
3) Finish primary source (this is a big goal, but I need to finish this novel!)
4) Read Magic chapter and write notes for chapter revision and article
5) Read a secondary source article/chapter
6) Write 1000 words for intro
7) Acquire everything I need to celebrate Valentine's Day upon my return (I return from conference on V-Day)

heu mihi
1) Get a really rough, but complete-ish, draft of my talk together.
2) Start organizing things for upcoming conferences and summer research travel.
3) Work through Article H to the best of my ability.
4) Allow myself to neglect my Latin translation for a while.

Humming42
1 finish short bio piece
2 finish extended abstract

JaneB
From Week 5
1) sleep and food
2) gym once (this weekend, Sat or Sun. Meant to go yesterday, ended up being at work from 08:30 to 7pm and after that I'd just had enough of people)
3) reply to DrVisit about a joint paper.
4) freewrite about Picky Paper. I think I have an emotional problem with Picky Paper I just can't quite catch hold of it and drag it out into the light to take a good look at it and see if it's a mouse or a mammoth, as the strategies need to be different depending).

Karen:
From Week 5
1. Finish pulling apart paper.
2. 15 minutes freewriting at beginning of each work day
3. 250 words added (minimum) each day.
4. 3 x exercise
5. 10.30 screen time curfew, and evening work to be only set small tasks with time limit.

KJHaxton
1. Establish order in the TLQ ranks - I need to make a priority list of what needs to be done first, chase down a couple of 'may be things' that need to be on the radar screen, and work out deadlines.
2. Make the hat.
3. Get a handle on the TRQ and generally make lists, deal with the easy items and clear space for TLQ in the coming weeks.

Kris
1. Finish the paper and send to group for comments
2. Pitch a short piece to the media
3. Sort out commitments to grant I don't like.
4. Keep up to date with my admin & leadership responsibilities.

Matilda (from week 2)
1) Finish the paper.
2) Start to write the short article.
3) Write documents for my sabbatical 2017.
4) Have less snacks at night.
5) Exercise for 5 minutes three times a day

Scottish Writer (from week 2)
1) Finalise last Semester’s grades and get through exam boards
2) Hand over one big admin role to colleague
3) Draft of one grant application
4) 2x 1 hour article writing sessions
5) 2x 1 hour translation sessions
6) No work at the weekend.

Susan
1. Finish book review
2. Read two books for book prize
3. Get organized for next week's writing retreat (taking place in my house, but I'm declaring the long weekend a writing retreat!)
4. Do one journal
5 Exercise four times
6. Sleep regularity

Have a great week!

39 comments:

  1. Five Things I've Done Right This Year

    I love this. I especially love the direction to think about it as if we were supporting a friend. I sometimes think that being as kind to one's self as one would be to one's friends is a real challenge -- and I know I've told some of my friends at times to stop beating themselves up because they are being mean to my friend! (We're all so hard on ourselves. I am so hard on myself too! I saw something recently on FB about how kindness is the root of all spirituality and my first thought was how difficult it was to be kind to one's self.)

    1. I've done an amazing job of working on Cool and Important Service Project (that I love and no one else seems to).
    2. I'm eating better (not eating as much chocolate and sweets as I want to) and taking my supplements and all that.
    3. I'm doing a decent job of my grading. My first project I got back to students in a week. And I'm not desperately behind at the moment, though, yes, I have a lot of grading to do.
    4. I'm doing a better job of trying to articulate some boundaries. I'm one of those people who do a lot of service and sometimes feel that people dump things on me because I'm dependable that way. Now it's probably not at all conscious on anyone's part that this dumping on me seems to happen. But I did send an email about some limits. (Though the way it worked out, it didn't matter, but I feel like I did a good thing for myself anyway because doing so also forced me to articulate some of my weaknesses, which I hate doing. So it took courage.)
    5. I'm doing a good job of trying to be myself in some uncomfortable situations, which takes courage. Even though it still makes me want to run back into my cave and spend about a decade resmoothing my feathers. I haven't totally gotten down the fact that I don't have to care what people think of me because I have tenure. But I am doing a better job of letting my weirdness be out there rather than twisting myself up inside. It does make me feel exposed and vulnerable. Courage.

    This is great because then at the end of this session, we can tally up our successes even more.

    Last Week's Goals

    1. Research: Write at least 3x for half hour. Work on article revisions. DONEish: I don't know if I wrote 3x, but I also read a bunch of a book that I hadn't been able to get myself to read. I did work on the article revisions a bit.

    2. Health: Here I need to be good to my leg and take my supplements and generally be very good to myself when it comes to food and stress. DONE, but I managed to get sick anyway. It was the lack of sleep and since I was gone I wasn't able to do my usual cold-prevention strategies. So now I'm sick.

    3. Read: Bring a book for the plane and to help go to sleep. DONE: I read a big chunk of a book for research. Mwwwwaaaahuaaaa!

    4. Family: Love them this weekend. I did, but we were all stressed by the upcoming trip. I hate leaving them.

    5. Herbalism: Nothing doing on this front. !

    6. Work: I'm taking grading with me on my trip, and I'd like to get at least five projects done per day. I also have some short pieces to grade, and I'd like to get those done also, but that might be a bit much. I also need to prep Friday while I'm gone. DONE: I did only 5 total, reorganized my grading load to make more sense, and though I prepped Friday really well, ended up cancelling.

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    1. Upcoming Week Goals

      1. Research and Read: Finish article revisions this week and turn them in. Keep toe in the water with Research during this Service-intensive time by writing or reading. 3x

      2. Health: My anxiety about one thing has spiraled off the charts, and it is clear to me that it is not based on any kind of rational foundation, but is just part of some hormonal ungluing/anxiety disorder. Perhaps this week I could move forward by even one exercise in the Anxiety or Stress CBT books? Other than this, I have to keep up the good work with food, supplements, and sleep. Must get sleep.

      3. Family: So we have a couple things in the cooker for Spirited Son, and we need to move forward with that. I need to talk to his piano teacher and make plans for a friend of his to come over. We also need to look at the Cub Scouts. Perhaps some kind of gym class or something so he gets some movement. So I need to keep things moving here. My crucial work here is to stop talking about Cool Service Project and work at home. I need to be more with them when I'm with them. I think part of the answer to this is that when I'm home on the weekdays, I need to treat it more like a workday and leave the weekends completely family oriented. I need to remember to not talk or get emotive about work with them.

      4. Herbalism and Gardening. It's the middle of February, and I need to get my act together with planning the gardening for the year. I started this, but I need to order some seeds and the blueberry plants. I also need to figure out when I need to start seeds in the basement. This is an important part of family actually. I'm also going to make that kava kava thing today.

      5. Work: I need to keep up a decent grading pace while also leading a search and working very seriously this week on Big Service Project. I really think that the key to moving like water with all this is to moderate emotions and not let myself go into getting frustrated or anxious or angry. I need to work on changing my attitude a bit better (not in a silly pop-psycho way, but in a reframing way to see if there are better ways to think about it all). I do love what I'm doing in Big Service Project, so that really helps.

      Have a great week! Move like water (instead of like a linebacker) everyone!

      Delete
    2. Great job of finding five things to be proud of. I find it especially hard to be myself. I spent years being a chameleon ("Who do you want me to be, and I'll be that"), so it is difficult to just be myself, and not worry about someone not liking my choice in music or whatever. Good for you!

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  2. That's a tricky discussion topic! My 5 things since 1st January:
    1 - 3 gave three conference presentations on three projects (Scary, House and Picture).
    4. Decided to give up admin role and gave up admin role.
    5. Submitted article (one of the Scary twins)
    We've also not finished the 'Christmas chocolate', an act that either reflects the very large quantity of chocolate acquired, or an unusual display of will power. It's a mixture of both. I also gave up hot chocolate from the campus coffee place - after the break for Christmas I realised I didn't actually like them.


    Last week:
    1. Establish order in the TLQ ranks - I need to make a priority list of what needs to be done first, chase down a couple of 'may be things' that need to be on the radar screen, and work out deadlines.
    2. Make the hat.
    3. Get a handle on the TRQ and generally make lists, deal with the easy items and clear space for TLQ in the coming weeks.

    I tidied my office, finished the easy TRQ stuff and thought about TLQ stuff but I didn't have enough information to decide exactly what was coming up. I did make hat number 2 and it fits me perfectly. Now I'm tackling husband's hat which is a bit trickier because he wants the pattern adapted to his preferences and also it's handspun wool with all the quirks of that.

    This week:
    1. Finish very short article on Loop project
    2. Finish hat number 3
    3. Get scary data in order to tackle second scary twin paper.

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    Replies
    1. A tidy office is a wonderful thing, as is a nicely fitting hat.

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    2. I like that you separated deciding to give up the admin role and giving it up--sometimes I find it hard to follow through on internal decisions.

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    3. This comment has been removed by the author.

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  3. What a great question. Things I'm proud of myself for since January 1:
    1 and 2: I've been a good daughter. And I'm giving myself credit on two levels, because on the one hand I've been advocating for my other and arranging care, etc; on the other hand, I've been *really* spending time with her, talking to her. This is a half hour or even an hour a day, so basically another day of work.
    3. I've kept moving on TLQ projects. Maybe more slowly than I hoped, but moving nonetheless.
    4. I'm rocking my teaching, I think. I feel really good about the class I'm teaching, and I love some of my assignments.
    5. I've managed to be a good citizen (especially on Badly Run Committee that Matters) in spite of being kind of bummed about everything at work.
    [6. I've actually said no to things because I knew things with my mother were difficult. This is a big deal for me.]

    Goals from Last week:
    1. Finish book review DRAFT done, needs one more read.
    2. Read two books for book prize. NO
    3. Get organized for next week's writing retreat (taking place in my house, but I'm declaring the long weekend a writing retreat!) YES, and that meant clearing lots of paper off my desk and paying bills for me and my mother.
    4. Do one journal NO
    5 Exercise four times YES
    6. Sleep regularity Better, but not perfect

    Analysis: Well, life. They were ambitious goals. The writing retreat is being interrupted by a minor infection (UTI) which led to a trip to the Urgent Care this morning, and will lead to another one tomorrow morning because they were full. Which is just a reminder that I can't plan things entirely.

    Goals for next week:
    1. Finish ms and email to press
    2. Finish book review
    3. Read at least one prize book
    4. Prepare for meeting with accountant re. taxes
    5. Exercise 5 times
    6. Sleep reguarly

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I hope you feel better soon. And goal #1 for this week is VERY exciting!

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    2. I hope you feel better! It is hard to be a good citizen when bummed out about work, so good job there. It is also hard to say no for personal reasons, which, at least in my experience, don't hold the weight that some work reason would.

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  4. Intriguing question. Like Susan, I'm mostly focused on the myriad of concerns and relationships surrounding a dying parent, and I'm proud of myself for coping pretty well in that situation (while also allowing myself room/permission to not entirely cope at times). I probably could do at least pieces of it better, but I've done a pretty good job of arranging and taking advantage of opportunities for positive interactions (phone and in-person) with my father. They haven't been as frequent as I'd like, but they are happening, and that's partly because I've been both patient and persistent despite the cost in emotional energy of dealing with my stepmother (who has actually behaved reasonably decently in this situation; however, there is enough of a history between us, and there are enough signs that she'd still prefer not to deal with me at all if she could choose to do so, that each encounter, even on the phone, is anxiety-making in prospect and usually requires processing afterward. I've also done a pretty good job of being kind to my stepmother (though I could probably make more of a positive effort there; I'm quite good at this point at not provoking her, not that I ever did so deliberately).

    Probably most of all, I've done what I can to support my brother, who is ending up much more directly involved in Dad's care than I (which is a bit counterintuitive from both a geographical and a gender-roles standpoint, but it seems to be working for all involved), and is also dealing with a struggling marriage. And I'll add that I'm proud of him for juggling all that and maintaining a relationship with me (though we both have a variety of strong incentives to make that work, including the very real possibility that, when the dust has settled, each of us will be the other's primary adult family member). Most of all, I think I'm generally lowering the drama quotient in a family system that has at least one master drama-stirrer (my stepmother) and one person who generally isn't, but who is currently pretty close to the emotional edge (my brother, who fortunately also has good, professional help in working his way through these twin crises).

    And I've kept up reasonably well with teaching (i.e. I'm no further behind, and perhaps a bit less so, than usual at this point in the semester).

    I also think I'm doing a pretty good job of using this unusual period in my life for reflection: on how I work (and balance work with other parts of my life); on what I'd like to do next; etc.

    In other words, so far, so good. I suspect the worst is yet to come, and I need to be prepared for that, but I also feel like I've got some reserves left (even if I haven't been quite as successful in ordering sleep, exercise, and food as I'd like), which is another achievement.

    So that's my unnumbered statement/list.

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    Replies
    1. Last week's goals:

      1. Fit in more regular exercise
      2. Keep working on establishing bedtime routine
      3. Continue work on boxes
      4. Try to take a full day off

      1. Not really (weather isn't helping, but still could have done better)
      2. Worked on it, with mixed success, including some externally-induced failures and some internally-induced ones
      3. Ended up doing something different than I'd planned (digging up some family letters my brother wanted, and scanning them before passing them on so we'd both have copies), but fair enough
      4. Couldn't have taken a full day off (see dealing w/ phone calls, arrangements for phone calls, etc., above), but could have taken more of a day off than I did.

      Analysis: I'm definitely at the point in the semester where, even normally, I'm beginning to think in terms of just holding on to the basics until spring break, and this year that feeling is even stronger. On the other hand, I still have three weeks to go, and I'd like to make at least some progress on TLQ goals during that period (even though I've also got a conference paper not listed on the TLQ goals and a lot of meetings to attend during that period). So I guess I'll keep listing the goals, even if I'm meeting them rather imperfectly. At the very least, I end up with a weekly checkup/reminder of mostly self-care goals, which are important at a point when my attention tends to get distracted to others and their needs (and mostly rightfully so). So, these are going to sound rather familiar, but here goes:

      1. Fit in more regular exercise
      2. Keep working on establishing bedtime routine
      3. Continue work on boxes (another storage run and/or some packing/mailing, whichever fits in better around other things, including the weather)
      4. Make some more oatmeal, and some more soup
      5. Try to figure out some kind of time off

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    2. Just sending you fellow-feeling -- though it sounds as if your experience is more complicated and difficult than mine, since I"m the primary caregiver, and I think my mother may be further from death, so we have a reprieve on the crisis front. But no matter, it's a hard row to hoe. (And when we were dealing with my stepmother, who kind of washed her hands of my father as his alzheimer's progressed, talking with my sibs made a huge difference.

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    3. Thank you. I think all these situations are complicated/difficult in their own way. We went through the extended-decline scenario with two grandmothers, and that one's not easy, either. The whole sibling thing is definitely important (and interesting; since both of my parents were only children, my brother and I are pretty much making it up as we go along, which isn't a bad thing, either; we could have had good models, but we could also could have had bad ones. As it is, my stepmother managed to drive some wedges between us in past years -- whether deliberately or unconsciously I'm not going to speculate, but splitting people into good/bad groups is definitely part of her MO -- but we seem to have overcome that fairly well in the past few years).

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    4. Hugs to both you and Susan, Cassandra. I agree all these situations are difficult, and the fact that you and your brother are dealing well with each other is a saving grace.

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  5. Great idea. From, probably, most to least meaningful:

    1) I was, to the best of my ability, really there for my dear friend in the immediate aftermath of his baby's death. He opened up to me quite a bit that night and we cried together.... I was also in frequent contact with him in the weeks leading up to it--just a no-need-to-answer text now and again, and talking to him when he felt up to it. He has said that I was a comfort, and I'm very glad about that.
    2) I'm making steady progress on my writing. I think that it's actually becoming a habit to work on it every (week)day--one that I was never able to develop in my old job.
    3) Twice-a-week yoga is a firmly ingrained habit, and I love it. Also, my teacher is encouraging me to do the 100-hour intensive that they run every spring; I'm going to wait until after tenure (2-3 years), but for some reason I found this really flattering! (I'm not going to think that it's because she wants my money.)
    4) I'm getting back into the language that I haven't used in almost 15 years, and reading academic articles in it is not quite as horrifying an ordeal as it was two months ago.
    5) I did a few little re-organizing things in the bedroom and bathroom last week, and I'm finding them tremendously pleasing.

    Last week's goals:
    1) Get a really rough, but complete-ish, draft of my talk together. DONE (it's rough)
    2) Start organizing things for upcoming conferences and summer research travel. DID A VERY TINY BIT OF THIS--VERRRRY TINY
    3) Work through Article H to the best of my ability. HALFWAY THROUGH IT
    4) Allow myself to neglect my Latin translation for a while. DONE! I neglected it completely!

    This week's goals:
    1) Ideally, go through the whole to-do list on the talk and fill in the blanks (with notes if not actual paragraphs)
    2) Complete Article H
    3) Start the next article on my list
    4) Firm up plans for Feb. conference travel (i.e. look at the damn bus schedule already)

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    Replies
    1. I like goal #4, and your success thereon. I will have to contemplate setting some such goals myself (when the occasion warrants).

      But seriously, deciding what not to do (not to even contemplate doing; not to put at the bottom of the to-do list; just to take off the to-do list entirely for the present) is a useful skill.

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    2. Your support of your friend is certainly something to be proud of, heu mihi. On the smaller side of things, I am amazed at how well rearranging a space helps brighten one's mood

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  6. Good topic! Since January 1st I've managed to:
    1) complete my writing sample for the review
    2) submit a conference proposal
    3) enjoy 11 creative writing sessions
    4) start cooking for my partner again
    5) move on to the next stage spiritually *secret secret*

    Last week:
    -Write for three pomodori every day (only one today, to get started).
    I didn't use the timer after all but definitely made this goal
    -Reread and submit on Sunday/Monday morning.
    Ready to submit, need one last re-read.
    -Also, do not forget to prepare a conference proposal for Friday.
    Submitted a proposal
    -Do some creative writing, if possible.
    Did it on Mon/Wed/Fri

    This week:
    Do one PhD-related task a day to prepare for the probation review
    Write fiction EVERY DAY
    Cook good things for loved ones

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    Replies
    1. Great list, Danne. I need to start cooking again, too, and finally got the ingredients for some family favorites this morning.

      Excellent job on the goals, too!

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  7. this was an interesting topic experience... I put the post up, and then couldn't for the life of me respond to my own prompt! I just couldn't think of anything so I slunk off and did other things for 2 days... Then I read comments and remembered the "as if it was a friend" directions - that worked and I could finally come up with 5 things... Exactly why I put that in there!

    In no particular order:
    1. I'm working really hard at getting revisions done on two papers that have been haunting me for years, and there is actually light at the end of the tunnel. I'm also happy that I had the common sense to very promptly ask for an extension when it became obvious that they revisions were too big to do in the original time frame.
    2. Happy with progress of my main large project, results are starting to come in, and I've done a very good job developing collaborations that will help it move forward.
    3. Very happy with the few days of skiing I've done with child, we're really been enjoying that.
    4. Did a good job talking my grad student off the ledge of thesis despair and set her up with some very concrete strategies for progress, without making things worse!
    5. Organized real life writing group with 4 other lovely people who are really committed to it.

    Last week's goals:
    REVISIONS - making lots of progress.
    Grading - getting done, but only while watching tv late at night!

    This week's goals:
    It is a short week with a holiday, but no teaching, so FINISH REVISIONS is all I'm doing.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. It was an excellent prompt, and the "what a friend would say" addition was a very good idea.

      It sounds like you're doing a good job of making progress on your own work, supporting others' (including in ways that will also help with your own), and making time for family. Kudos!

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    2. Great topic, Daisy, and as you can see from the comments, most of us needed to use the "talking to a friend" trick.

      Your things to be proud of show your support of others, as CC says, which is the part of academia I enjoy best.

      As for grading only with the tv on, that was me, only with sherry at hand, too!

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  8. One of the reasons I'm so late here is also one of my entries on the 'done right' list - I've been disconnecting from work over the weekends, and as I don't work Mondays I've been leaving TLQ group till I hit work time.
    - start winter vege seedling for the garden hopefully in time!
    - get the big logisitical pieces organised for fieldwork
    - write a grant application
    -exercise consistently and even when I didn't feel like it

    It's now less than a week out from the start of our semester and so I think my challenge for myself is to keep the right things happening as part of a routine that includes teaching.
    Last two weeks:
    1. Finish pulling apart paper. Nope.
    2. 15 minutes freewriting at beginning of each work day. Nope
    3. 250 words added (minimum) each day. Nope.
    4. 3 x exercise Yes.
    5. 10.30 screen time curfew, and evening work to be only set small tasks with time limit. Mostly.
    The no on writing for one paper was balanced out by two days of writing retreat where I clarified a SoTL project and made some inroads into the lit review for it.

    This week is mostly about sanity:
    1. Exercise x3
    2. No crazy late nights
    3. Hold Friday afternoon writing time
    4. Move like water and calmly get all the pieces in place for beginning of semester.

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    Replies
    1. Disconnecting over the weekends is really helpful. I've been keeping to a pretty hard-and-fast "no work email on Sundays" rule (which doesn't mean I don't do any work on Sundays, but does mean I don't check email, and avoid doing things that would signal my presence on the LMS to students) and it definitely helps with the tendency of work to expand to fill all the space allotted. Most of it can wait 'til Monday, it turns out. But I haven't managed to claim Saturday as well so far. What I'd really like to do is take Friday off, but it's hard to come up with schedules for both face to face and online classes that makes that feasible.

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    2. I'm envious of your exercise win, and getting organized--both difficult spots for me!

      As for not writing, digging into the lit review is writing preparation, I think. I'm glad you see it as counting, too,

      Delete
  9. This is, indeed, a good topic, but I must admit that I approach it grumpily because last week wasn't great for my goals. But let's see:

    1) I've said "no" to several service things (in the spirit of focusing some time on the PhD)
    2) I have done a good job of spending weekly time on the PhD
    3) My conference paper was well-received on Saturday
    4) I've been eating more veggies
    5) I've had some nice quality time with each child

    Last week's goals:
    1) Drink fluids and sleep enough to prevent worsening of cold. DONE. It wasn't fun, but it didn't become a secondary infection, etc.
    2) Finish conference paper and slides (this will be TRQ soon). DONE. Paper given.
    3) Finish primary source (this is a big goal, but I need to finish this novel!). NOPE.
    4) Read Magic chapter and write notes for chapter revision and article. STARTED this. Not finished.
    5) Read a secondary source article/chapter. NO, but I attended two days worth of conference sessions. Does that count? I think it does.
    6) Write 1000 words for intro. HAHAHAHAHA!
    7) Acquire everything I need to celebrate Valentine's Day upon my return (I return from conference on V-Day). SORT OF. But I didn't set it all up before I left for the conference, and didn't touch base with hubby, so kids woke up to nothing, and daughter was distressed.

    Analysis: My drive to the conference ended up taking WAY longer than I thought it would, so I lost several hours on that travel day. Then I spent a lot of evening time tweaking my conference paper and doing teaching prep, so I didn't get much other writing or reading done for the dissertation.

    This week and next the grading starts to get crazy. Keeping up with TRQ will be very difficult.

    1) Read article by guy I met at the conference
    2) Print, read, and reconsider outline for intro
    3) Write 500 words of intro
    4) Finish reading/reviewing Chapter 2
    5) Read 75 pages of primary source
    6) Put my phone away when I'm with the kiddos (I don't look at it very often, but I feel self-conscious when I do. I want to model more mindfulness, not the need to check messages as a reflex.)
    7) Help son figure out his gaming problem.

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    1. P.S. Writing those five things made me feel much less grumpy. Thank you!

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    2. This is a great topic for pulling one out of the doldrums, I found. As for your goals, it's hard to stop tweaking a paper, and travel always seems to take longer (why is that!?!?)

      Spending time weekly with each child gives you the opportunity to address your daughter's distress, as well. My kids, even now, remember the one-on-one times with me with great nostalgia.

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  10. Showing up very late to say yes, I finished and submitted both of my writing projects, and now find myself in the fluster of unexpectedly applying for a job that just landed on my radar. Exciting and exhausting!

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    1. Very best of luck with the job app. allan wilson

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    2. Yes, to echo Allan, all the best with the job application. They are exhausting, so I hope the excitement wins the day.

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  11. Topic: Make a list of 5 things you did since January; things that if a friend had done them, you'd be telling her/him that you are impressed or proud :)
    This has been tough, but like many others have commented, it really helps to think of what I would tell a friend.
    In no particular order:
    1) I refused to come back to work early after my surgery. Also, since I have been back, every time someone expects me to step forward to do something my boss should do, but has neglected to do, I demur. I am becoming practiced at saying, essentially, “Not my job, man.”

    2) I went to bat for one of my staff, who asked for permission to do something allowed by the university, that would greatly improve her quality of life. My boss resisted, and I pushed back.

    3) After making three hats for my sister’s grandchildren and a hat and scarf for my DH, I bought some fabulous wool and silk yarn to make myself a cowl.

    4) I started to go through my stash of yarn (two large boxes so far, blush!), contacted my niece who is an impoverished college student, and mailed three boxes of yarn to her so far, with at least three more to go.

    4) I managed to take my sons to a town I adore without forcing them to like it as much, or in the same way, as I do. I didn’t drag them anywhere, but let them explore it on their own.

    Long ago week’s goals:
    Write at least 500 words and clean up a page of footnotes on the critical edition. Actually, yes, I have done this several times since I last checked in!

    Finish outlining the short story. I have to give up this goal for the foreseeable future.

    Do better with commenting and responding on this post. No, I have been awful. I do read everyone’s comments, but I have been feeling too embarrassed or sorry for myself to post.

    Analysis:
    I gave up several of my own goals for at least the rest of the calendar year to help my DH finish his tenure requirements. He does need my help, and he has done the bulk of the cooking, cleaning, and all that during my tenure preparation, so it is only fair. The other piece of this, though, is that I have so very little time to myself that I really hate to give up the hour a day when I write. I work in a cube farm, and live in a small house bursting with people. I yearn for some space of my own, which only appears in the wee hours, between when my sons finally go to bed and when my DH gets up in the morning. I will still be up and alone, but I won’t be writing. I know, I’m being selfish. I did not go gently into this one, but at least, I managed to contain my whining, so he thinks I am only slightly upset.

    Next/This week’s goals:
    1) Another page of footnotes 2x.

    2) Respond and support this group, which has been very good to me.


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    1. I totally get the need for time for yourself. But it's hard if its in the middle of the night!

      I'm impressed that you're holding your boss accountable!

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    2. I try not to feel guilty, but I am an introvert, and really need time alone to recharge. On the plus side, I seem to have regained some energy since my surgery, and am finding getting up a bit more easy.

      As for protecting my staff, I remember far too well being afraid to push for my rights, and I promised myself I would pay it forward if and when I could. I'm just happy to have that chance.

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  12. Hi all, I came to our page a few days ago and thought the topic was an awesome one, and so affirming, so I have been thinking about it ever since. If I imagine myself as a friend, it becomes so much easier to do this. Anyway here goes,
    1.I was assertive about something that wasn't ok at work, and got my point of view heard. As a pretty non assertive person, this was an important thing to do and took a lot of courage. We ended up with a very constructive outcome.
    2. I have juggled a myriad of home responsibilities really well, while managing to be present at work.
    3. I have worked really hard to move from an unmotivated and low emotional state after a summer holiday, to get back into working solidly
    4. I overcame feeling really panicked by a new lab technique and situation, by calmly working through it, training myself to just go and do it, and ask for help when I needed to. People were great- really supportive.
    5. I am valuing myself more, and making an effort to eat well and exercise well to honour who I am.
    Last week's goals:
    1. Physical health: exercise (walk) at least 4x. YES
    2. Mental health: spend half an hour a day on my own, without interruptions, every day A COUPLE OF DAYS
    3. Family: go to son's sports day for half a day. Cook a really nice dinner once. YES, managed these. Although the dinner wasn't superb, it was fine and nutritious
    4. Work: TLQ - look at, examine and reconstruct if necessary, 5 year goals. NO, but bizarrely I did do last week's unfinished goal of finishing the final draft of a paper and sending it back to my co-author for very minor edits. So a bizarre kind of making progress
    5. Also, TRQ- write request for a piece of equipment, which first requires email conversation with overseas colleague that may or may not be productive YES - I very nearly got derailed on this one by some awful stuff at work, but managed to pull myself together and feel angry, and do this on the back of that energy.
    5. Fun: I can't even think of anything here, but imagine it will probably cross over with my half hour alone each day. WELL - I'm a work in progress on this one!

    This week's goals:
    1.Do overdue biological measurements
    2. 10,000 steps each day
    3. Stick to a nutritious eating plan
    4. Do 250 words on the mammal paper.
    So, this week my book project is again taking a back seat, but I think I will sit that goal out this week and focus on achieving these others.
    Thanks to all here for being such a thoughtful group, and sharing ideas and strategies- echoing Elizabeth Anne
    allan wilson

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    1. Lots to be proud of, Allan. I can relate to the difficulty of being assertive, as well as asking for help--things I'm slowly getting better at doing, but not perfectly.

      Great job on goals, too!

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  13. A good topic, but I've not got much to say to it. What is 'doing something right' is an interesting question for me at the moment. But let's try:
    1) I got a cold within a week or so of the students returning from their intersemester break, and I've been totally boring and sensible, doing everything I should, sleeping a great deal, ignoring everything other than getting my teaching done and ensuring I am getting a decent amount of fruit/veg in my diet and wearing clean clothes when I leave the house... and so far I still have a functional speaking voice and none of the symptoms of laryngitis (though I did have a near-full-on-panic-attack when I saw one of my Lists and realised how behind I am on my admin and research goals. One 'advantage' of getting proerply sick and losing my voice and ending up off work is that the first tasks I can pick up are the research ones, so I fall less behind on that guilt and joy inducing, career-enhancing part of my workload).
    2) some students say they are enjoying the stats classes! This is most unusual...
    3) I split one nail quite badly and managed to resist the urge to bite off the dangly bit which snags on things and waited until I had access to clippers to tidy it up properly, and therefore no blood was shed and the nail is already grown out enough to look decent again, rather than looking as if I tried to chew my finger off for weeks?
    4) I got my dad an awesome birthday present (he's REALLY hard to buy for, but I managed to find a second hand copy of a novel which he didn't know existed, by an obscure 1970s writer who my Dad thinks is really, really funny).
    5) I dunno! Finished my grading on time? Though that IS my job, so hardly something exceptional, multiple colleagues failed at it this time around.

    Old goals:
    1) sleep and food - ish. Done lots of sleeping!
    2) gym once (this weekend, Sat or Sun. nope, cold residues mean I am still wheezing with every change in temperature
    3) reply to DrVisit about a joint paper.yes
    4) freewrite about Picky Paper. I think I have an emotional problem with Picky Paper I just can't quite catch hold of it and drag it out into the light to take a good look at it and see if it's a mouse or a mammoth, as the strategies need to be different depending).still don't know really what the problem is, but have 'begun in the middle' and done a couple of hours of simulations using the software concerned which will go into the paper, and roughed out the topics for the intro, so...

    next week the last really busy teaching-and-teaching-prep week of the semester, made worse by me probably not having a day off (my only 'free' day will be spent with LikesMaths training them on field methods - assuming either the weather warms up or my late-cold-symptoms have passed, as breathing the damp and around-zero-celsius outdoor air whilst strolling from my car to the building, less than 5 minutes, leaves me coughing excessively and with an asthmatic wheeze and headache that take half an hour to abate - not a good condition for fieldwork outside!). So pretty minimal goals.
    1) bed before midnight, and ensure sufficient protein and fruit & veg in diet (even if accompanied by too many carbs and sweets) - continue to limit dairy (helps reduce cattarrh and general phlegmy disgustingness)
    2) an hour of time spent with Picky Paper
    3) something fun, e.g. guilt free novel reading BEFORE quiz grading!

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    1. I'm glad you found things to be proud of, Jane. And yes, getting grading done counts, especially since that is often the dregs of the job.

      I think given the cold, you did a masterful job on the goals, too. I hope you feel much better!

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